“I’m a good student, Principal Skinner.” – Samantha Stanky
“Yeah, sure, and they told me I’d get a big parade when I got back from Nam. Instead they spat on me. I can still feel it searing. . . . So, let’s just see what the permanent record has to say, shall we? Hmm, no detention, fairly good attendance record, oh, I see you beat that bed wetting problem in the second grade.” – Principal Skinner
“That’s in there?” – Samantha Stanky
“Don’t worry, they’ll forget. . . . Just like they forgot about me in that tiger cage for eighteen agonizing months. Every night I wake up screaming! . . . Well, let’s meet your classmates!” – Principal Skinner