“Goody Simpson is entitled to due process.” – Quimby
“Okay, here’s how the process works: you sit on the broom and we shove you off the cliff.” – Wiggum
“What?” – Goody Simpson
“Well, hear me out. If you’re innocent you will fall to an honorable Christian death. If, however, you are the bride of satan, you will surely fly your broom to safety. At that point you will report back here for torture and beheading.” – Wiggum
Dead Homer Society 
5 responses to “Quote of the Day”
Love this episode! Definitely my favorite THOH and segment.
I agree — I love how the ending is this weird scene with 17th-century Puritans dressed in modern Halloween costumes, with the Sea Captain now narrating for some reason.
The bit where Wiggum says ‘Yeah, you hags are alright!’ gets me in stitches everytime.
And that’s the story of the first Caramel Cod! Er, I mean, Halloween!
I’ll be sure to say some phrases of this segment when I go out for Halloween .. most likely “I want a caramel cod” or something of the like.