“You know, there are three things we’re never going to get rid of here in Springfield: one, the bats in the public library; two, Mrs. McFearly’s compost heap; and, three, our six term mayor, the illiterate, tax cheating, wife swapping, pot smoking, spend-o-crat Diamond Joe Quimby.” – Birch Barlow
“Hey! I am no longer illiterate.” – Mayor Quimby