“Bart Simpson, is your book report on Treasure Island ready?” – Mrs. Krabappel
“Is it ready? Ha! What a question! Fellow students, prepare to be dazzled! . . . Well, as Mrs. Krabappel already mentioned, the name of the book that I read was Treasure Island. It’s about these pirates . . . Pirates with patches over their eyes . . . and shiny gold teeth . . . and green birds on their shoulders. Did I mention this book was written by a guy named Robert Louis Stevenson? And published by the good people at McGraw Hill. So, in conclusion, on the Simpson Scale of one to ten, ten being the highest. one being the lowest, and five being average, I give this book . . . a nine.” – Bart Simpson