“This isn’t just about Sideshow Bob! It’s a chance to turn around all our stinkin’ lives!” – Homer Simpson
Tag: Cape Feare
Double Secret Makeup Quote of the Day
“Hello, Moe? We know you’re the one behind this so knock it off or we’re going to the cops!” – Lisa Simpson “No, no. I’ll take care of it. . . . Okay it’s over, get ’em out of here! . . . Alright, andale! Andale!” – Moe
Quote of the Day
“We’ve left it all behind. How can you make a clean break with your life?” – Marge Simpson “Relax, Marge. I tied up all the loose ends before we left.” – Homer Simpson “Hello! Hello! You have my pills! . . . Hello! . . . I’m cold and there are wolves after me.” – Abe “Grampa” Simpson
Makeup Quote of the Day
“Oh, no, Dad’s been drugged.” – Lisa Simpson “No, he hasn’t.” – Marge Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Now, when I say ‘Hello, Mr. Thompson’ and press down on your foot, you smile and nod.” – FBI Agent “No problem.” – Homer Simpson “Hello, Mr. Thompson.” – FBI Agent “I think he’s talking to you.” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Well, what about that tattoo on your chest? Doesn’t it say ‘Die Bart Die’?” – Blue Haired Lawyer “No, that’s German for ‘The Bart, The’.” – Sideshow Bob “No one who speaks German could be an evil man.” – Parole Board Lady “Parole granted!” – Parole Board Chair
Quote of the Day
“Sideshow Bob tried to kill me on our honeymoon.” – Selma Bouvier “How many people in this court are thinking of killing her right now? . . . Be honest.” – Blue Haired Lawyer “She’s always leaving the toilet seat up.” – Patty Bouvier
Quote of the Day
“Homer, where’s the dog?” – Marge Simpson “I tied him up out back.” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“The following neighborhood residents will not be killed by me. Ned Flanders. Maude Flanders.” – Sideshow Bob “Oh, isn’t that nice?” – Ned Flanders
Quote of the Day
“Maude, these new finger razors make hedge trimming as much fun as sitting through church.” – Ned Flanders
Quote of the Day
“Wow, a houseboat. You know, the great thing is, if you don’t like your neighbors, you can just pull up the anchor and sail someplace else.” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Hey, kids, wanna drive through that cactus patch?” – Homer Simpson “Yeah!” – Bart Simpson “Yeah!” – Lisa Simpson “No!” – Sideshow Bob “Welp, two against one.” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“This isn’t just because of Sideshow Bob, it’s a chance to turn around all our stinking lives.” – Homer Simpson “I’ll be Gus, the loveable chimney sweep. Clean as a whistle, sharp as a thistle, best in all Westminster, yeah!” – Bart Simpson “Shutup, boy.” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“But who’d want to hurt me? I’m this century’s Dennis the Menace.” – Bart Simpson “It’s probably the person you least suspect.” – Homer Simpson “That’s good, Dad.” – Lisa Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Hello, Moe? We know you’re the one behind this, so knock it off or we’re going to the cops!” – Lisa Simpson “No, no, I’ll take care of it. Okay it’s over, get ’em out of here! Alright, andele! Andele!” – Moe Happy 20th anniversary to “Cape Feare”! Original airdate 7 October 1993.
Quote of the Day
“Robert, if released would you pose any threat to one Bart Simpson?” – Lawyer “Bart Simpson? The spirited little scamp who twice foiled my evil schemes and sent me to this dank, urine soaked hell hole?” – Sideshow Bob “Uh, we object to the term ‘urine soaked hell hole’ when you could’ve said ‘pee pee soaked heck hole’.” – Parole Officer “Cheerfully withdrawn.” – Sideshow Bob
Quote of the Day
“Oh, my God! Someone’s trying to kill me! . . . Oh, wait. It’s for Bart.” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Well, I’d like to help you, ma’am, but I’m afraid there’s no law against mailing threatening letters.” – Chief Wiggum “I’m pretty sure there is.” – Marge Simpson “Ha, the day I take cop lessons from Ma Kettle-” – Chief Wiggum “Hey, she’s right, Chief.” – Lou “Well, shut my mouth. It’s also illegal to put squirrels down your pants for the purposes of gambling . . . boys, knock it off!” – Chief Wiggum
Mr. Burns, A Post-Electric Play: Enjoyed By All
By Hank Pumpkins Let me start out by saying this: I both love to pretend, and am horrible at, being a journalist, a profession where my egocentrism is at odds with my sheer obliviousness. Which explains why I showed up to the Wooly Mammoth Theatre haughty with lofty perceptions of how I would craft my review-de-resistance—and also why I showed up looking like a sweaty bum, wearing a White Sox cap, my trusty Toms loafers, and a t-shirt of Boba Fett if he were a dog (“Boba Fetch”, a bartender explained to me later—like I said, oblivious). Were I a more conscious human being, I probably would have given half a thought to bringing a date, and dining with her there at the theatre (they had delicious looking food, surprise surprise), but I didn’t. So, instead, I pretended to be a journalist all night; which is to say, I grabbed beer as fast as possible and hid my awkwardness under the veil of "fly on the wall" integrity, to try and catch a slice of both play-house Americana as well as Simpson-neck-beard-fandom in the surprisingly funny and poignant Mr. Burns, A Post-Electric Play. There was much less of the latter group than the former; I was a bit disappointed I didn’t spot any Geniuses At Work, as it were, though there were several people in the audience that had that decisive “I remember this episode and quote it fondly” loud laugh (which matched my own). The rest of the audience were the seasoned play-goers, people who were “down on the scene”, “with the haps”, and whatever other 60’s slang I can think of. The kind of people that don’t come in buzzed off their ass, whipping out their camera phone and snapping pictures until a friendly, though scared, attendant begs me to stop taking photos. Alas, I lost my only chance of someone saying “sir” without adding, “You’re making a scene.” During intermission, the various different play-going demographics—suits, the elderly, cute girls in sun-dresses—parsed out the play with various success: they chattered about the meaning of The Simpsons in our society, pop-culture’s place in the future, and sometimes, rather simply, “Side-what Bob?” I found it cute. The playwright, Anne Washburn, mentions in the booklet that The Simpsons was a serendipitous, though later obvious, symbolic pop-culture choice which the survivors of an unnamed apocalypse cobble together as a means of bonding and survival. Her play is at once hilarious and a bitter pill, as Washburn’s characters find light and grace in possibly the only piece of pop-culture that would survive a nuclear holocaust. Dear God, I can’t believe I’m saying this, but it’s likely The Simpsons may be the cockroach that shakes off the radiation and survives us all. It’s clear as the play progresses, however, that time changes us all, and particularly our memories. For Post-Electric is not just an excuse for actors to quote Homer, but also a rumination on memory and story-telling, and a thought-provoking perspective of a…
Reading Digest: Frozen Electoral Fraud Edition
“Lisa, you got a letter.” – Marge Simpson “It’s from my pen pal, Anya.” – Lisa Simpson “Dear Lisa, as I write this I am very sad. Our president has been overthrown and-” – Anya “-replaced, by the benevolent General Krull. All hail Krull and his glorious new regime! Sincerely, little girl.” – General Krull Russia is having itself an election on Sunday, and earlier this week allegations emerged in Canada, the world’s other giant frozen country, that the current Prime Minister may have taken a few liberties with the last election. We’ve got links for both, though, befitting the disparate levels of shenanigans, the Russian one is much, much better. There’s also a new Simpsons video game, a YouTube video of FOX wasting some money, the final few remnants of the 500th episode stuff, a New Orleans street performer, and the last hurrah for a college basketball rivalry that Grampa Simpson would appreciate. Enjoy. An Ode To The Simpsons – Smooth Charlie’s Link of the week comes from a blog called “Dinosaur Boner”, which is tumescently awesome. It’s a thoughtful, heartfelt, and amusing look at the show and how it has declined. Not only does it agree with us: Nothing is meant to last though, and The Simpsons are not immune to that. After about season 12, the jokes and story telling took a nose dive. Every good idea had been used up by then. You can only do so many things with the same characters before a show goes stale. But it takes plenty of whacks at that self evidently substandard “At Long Last Leave” episode: – The last joke of the show was ok. Everyone in Springfield ends up following the Simpsons to their new squatter town (The Outlands), but they leave Principle Skinner behind. He looked sad and it was funny. Oh, but then they go and drag it out after a few of the credits run, kinda ruining it. They do that a lot. The whole thing is worth reading. Help Spot The References: Viral Video Mocks Putin Era – This time lapse video of Vladimir Putin in advance of Sunday’s – ahem – election is great: I only got the bigger references (Khodorkovsky, Beslan, Basayev, that submarine), but there’s a ton of stuff here. Medvedev gets it particularly bad. ПРЕВОСХОДНЫЙ! (That’s what rustran.com gave me for “Excellent”.) The Simpsons Celebrate New Episodes with Homer Sculpture – Fox released this little YouTube video about a bust of Homer they commissioned: Check out Jean at the 0:15 mark, “FOX is erecting a bust of Homer in honor of the 500th episode, and I’ve been told if we do another 500 we’ll get a torso.” Not my preferred course of action, of course, but the way he said cracked me up. JIM FALL: Despite what I expected, the sun came up Sunday – For business reasons, the universities of Kansas and Missouri will no longer be in the same athletic conference next year. This means that a…