“The next few weeks at my dream job were like a wonderful waking coma.” – Homer Simpson
Tag: And Maggie Makes Three
Quote of the Day
“Marge . . . ” – Homer Simpson “Homer . . . ” – Marge Simpson “I’ve got sand in my underpants.” – Homer Simpson “Me too. Let’s go home.” – Marge Simpson
Quote of the Day
‘Bowling! Bowling, here! Come bowl now! Get your bowling! Who’s ready? Bowling!” – Homer Simpson “Mom, make Dad tell the story right.” – Lisa Simpson “That’s what really happened.” – Marge Simpson “Oh.” – Lisa Simpson
Quote of the Day
“It was a tumultuous time for a nation! The clear beverage craze gave us all a reason to live. The information superhighway showed the average person what some nerd thinks about Star Trek. And the domestication of the dog continued unabated.” – Homer Siumpson
Quote of the Day
“This is incredible. It’s God’s most wondrous miracle.” – Mayor Quimby “Sir, I think your wife wants to hold the baby.” – Nurse “My wife? Where? Where!” – Mayor Quimby
Quote of the Day
“I was in Heaven. If horse racing is the sport of kings, then surely bowling is . . . a very good sport, as well.” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“We now return to Knight Boat, the crime solving boat.” – TV Announcer “Faster, Knight Boat! We gotta catch those starfish poachers!” – Not David Hasselhoff “You don’t have to yell, Michael. I’m all around you.” – Knight Boat
Quote of the Day
“So, come crawling back, eh?” – C.M. Burns “Seems like the classy thing to do would be not to call attention to it.” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“That new baby in your mother’s womb was a ticking time bomb threatening to blow this family eight ways from Sunday! . . . Hey, where are you going?” – Homer Simpson “Dad, you can’t expect a person to sit for thirty minutes straight.” – Bart Simpson “I’m gonna get a snack and maybe go to the bathroom.” – Lisa Simpson
Quote of the Day
“You’re a pin monkey? Wow! Finally I don’t have to be ashamed of my father’s job.” – Bart Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Hey, Uncle Al, can Homer have a job?” – Barney Gumble “Sure.” – Uncle Al “Woo-hoo!” – Homer Simpson “Barney, you’re fired.” – Uncle Al “Okay.” – Barney Gumble
Quote of the Day
“So, in a few months, both of you will have a brand new brother or sister.” – Marge Simpson “Been there, done that.” – Bart Simpson “I hope it’s a girl.” – Lisa Simpson “You know nothing about genetics, Lis. It goes boy-girl, boy-girl.” – Bart Simpson
Behind Us Forever: The Kids Are All Fight
“It all began about two years ago before Maggie was even born. Bart, you were Lisa’s age, and Lisa, you were the age Bart was several years ago.” – Homer Simpson As it has doddered along these last few years, Zombie Simpsons has started to turn to flash forward episodes a bit more often where Bart and Lisa are adults with kids of their own. For “The Kids Are All Fight”, they went the other way, going backwards to some indeterminate time a few years ago when Bart was four and Lisa was two. The story, which was even more…
Quote of the Day
“I’ll stay here, but I’m gonna think about products I might like to purchase. Ooh . . . Mmm . . . Ooh, I don’t have that.” – Marge Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Homer, did you polish your head in the Shine-O-Ball-O?” – Al “No.” – Homer Simpson “Okay, then.” – Al
Bea, What Was Birth Like?
“Homey, I think someone is saying hello.” – Marge Simpson Mad Jon’s lovely and talented Mrs. gave birth to a bouncing, baby Beatrice this morning. This is what he texted me: “It’s a boy! And what a boy!” Mother and daughter are both doing well, and I also have an artist’s rendition of Jon right now: Congratulations, parents. You gave your little girl the worst possible birthday. Merry Christmas.
Quote of the Day
“Back then, there was no way for me to know your mother was pregnant. . . . Marge! You tie up the bathroom every morning, I’ve gotta wash my hair!” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Show up tomorrow; bring three rags. Oh, and change your pants.” – Uncle Al “Why?” – Homer Simpson “When it happens, you’ll know.” – Uncle Al
Quote of the Day
“With my bills paid off I can finally quit this lousy job!” – Homer Simpson “But, Homer, how are you going to make a living?” – Lenny “Don’t worry about Homer J., I’ve got a plan . . . a plan that’ll fix you good.” – Homer Simpson “Hey, what did we do?” – Carl “Sorry, that just slipped out. I’ll miss you.” – Homer Simpson
Reading Digest: ‘And Maggie Makes Three’ Echoes Through the Ages Edition
“Thanks for giving me my old job back.” – Homer Simpson “I’m afraid it’s not that simple. As punishment for your desertion, it’s company policy to give you the plague.” – C.M. Burns “Uh, sir, that’s the plaque.” – Mr. Smithers “Ah, yes, the special de-motivational plaque, to break what’s left of your spirit. Because, you see, you’re here forever. . . . Don’t forget, you’re here forever.” – C.M. Burns This week we’ve got two fans, one brand new, one an old veteran, who agree that “And Maggie Makes Three” is as good as anything can possibly be. They’ll…