“She’s beautiful. Say something clever!” – Bart’s Brain “I fell on my bottom.” – Bart Simpson “D’oh!” – Bart’s Brain There are a lot problems with “Beware My Cheating Bart”. For starters, it’s kinda sexist and disturbing. Beyond that, it’s further evidence that Zombie Simpsons has turned its kid characters into empty, anti-human nobodies. And, of course, it manages to lack any kind of story coherence while doing all those things. What makes it all more glaring than usual is the way “Beware My Cheating Bart” so closely follows the plot, structure, and even jokes of the boundlessly superior “New…
Tag: Beware My Cheating Bart
Crazy Noises: Beware My Cheating Bart
“Bart, could you go get the cupcakes?” – Marge Simpson “Cupcakes? Cupcakes. Yes. Sweet cakes for all.” – Bart Simpson As part of our tireless efforts to demonstrate the many ways Zombie Simpsons fails to entertain, Season 23 will be subjected to the kind of rigorous examination that can only be produced by people typing short messages at one another. More dedicated or modern individuals might use Twitter for this, but that’s got graphics and short links and little windows that pop up when you put your cursor over things. The only kind of on-line communications we like are the…
Underage Sex Shouldn’t Be This Boring
“Mom, this is a little ahead of schedule, but I need help with my love life.” – Bart Simpson “Oh, my special little guy has a sweetheart.” – Marge Simpson “I knew it! Alright Bart, who’s your girlfriend?” – Lisa Simpson “Mrs. Krabappel.” – Bart Simpson In what I assume was an unintentional irony, early in “Beware My Cheating Bart”, the writers had Bart say, “Doesn’t anyone realize I’m only ten years old?”. The episode certainly didn’t, and it managed to be worse than most “Bart gets a girlfriend” stories to boot. Bart seems to vacillate between being an experienced…
Sunday Preview: Beware My Cheating Bart
Image bloodied by Dave. No good will come of this: When Bart is forced to chaperone Jimbo’s girlfriend to a movie, she ends up developing feelings for him, resulting in a whole bunch of trouble with the bullies at school. Meanwhile, Homer is persuaded to buy a state-of-the-art treadmill, fully equipped with a television. When Lisa shows Homer that he can access television shows wirelessly, he develops an obsession with watching an old television show from the treadmill, but not actually working out, until Marge decides to intervene. Since it’s not entirely clear as to which is what, I’m giving…