Tag: Separate Vocations

“One ocean tango, we are in pursuit of a speeding individual driving a red . . . car, license number: Eggplant-Xerxes-Crybaby-Overbite-Narwhal.” – Eddie

“We’re here for the tests.” – Armed Guard “C’mon, Emma.” – National Testing Center Engineer  

“Hey, Bart, you see that Caddy over there?” – Lou “Uh-huh.” – Bart Simpson “That’s Mayor Quimby’s car. Tonight his honor is, uh, polling the electorate.” – Lou “How would you, ah, like a street named after you?” – Mayor Quimby

“Police officer? Well, I’ll be jiggered.” – Bart Simpson “If you’d like to learn more, I could arrange for you to ride along in a police car for a night.” – Dr. J. Loren Pryor “Hey! I don’t need you to get me into the back of a police car.” – Bart Simpson

“Seymour, I’ll bet you a steak dinner those books are still here. All we have to do is search every locker.” – Bart Simpson “Oh, Bart, I’m not sure random locker searches are permitted by the Supreme Court.” – Principal Skinner “Pfft, Supreme Court, what have they done for us lately?” – Bart Simpson “Let’s move.” – Principal Skinner

“Here’s your scientifically selected career….” – Dr. J. Loren Pryor “Architect.” – Janie “Insurance salesman.” – Chuck “Salmon gutter?” – Ralph Wiggum “Military strongman!” – Milhouse van Houten “Systems Analyst . . . Systems Analyst . . . Systems Analyst . . .” – Martin Prince “Systems Analyst.” – Dr. J. Loren Pryor “Alright!” – Martin Prince

“Wow! Can I see your club?” – Bart Simpson “It’s called a baton, son.” – Lou “Oh. What’s it for?” – Bart Simpson “We club people with it.” – Lou

“Now, to show my gratitude, I want you to help yourself to an item of your choice.” – Principal Skinner “Alright!” – Bart Simpson “Ooh, now, you be careful with that crossbow.” – Principal Skinner “I will.” – Bart Simpson

“I have never seen a good student take such a slide. Lisa, what are you rebelling against?” – Principal Skinner “Whaddya got?” – Lisa Simpson Happy New Year!

“Ooh, they used nylon rope this time.  It feels so smooth against my skin, almost sensuous.” – Apu Nahasapeemapetilon

“That’s right, it was I.” – Lisa Simpson “Lis, why did you do it?” – Bart Simpson “Come on, Bart, in your pre-fascist days you knew the giddy thrill of futile rebellion.” – Lisa Simpson

“Bart, why’d you take the blame?” – Lisa Simpson “Cause, I didn’t want to wreck your life.  You got the brains and the talent to go as far as you want, and when you do, I’ll be right there to borrow money.” – Bart Simpson

“You know, your father wanted to be a police man for a little while, but they said he was too heavy.” – Marge Simpson “No, the army said I was too heavy.  The police said I was too dumb.” – Homer Simpson

“We’re going to take a test.” – Miss Hoover “Alright, a test!” – Lisa Simpson “It’s called the Career Aptitude Normalizing Test, or CANT.” – Miss Hoover