“Rainier Wolfcastle, star of McBain and the upcoming film ‘Help! My Son Is a Nerd!’.” – Kent Brockman “My son returns from a fancy East Coast college and I’m horrified to find he’s a nerd.” – Rainier Wolfcastle “I’m laughing already.” – Kent Brockman “It’s not a comedy.” – Rainier Wolfcastle “Oh.” – Kent Brockman
Tag: Krusty Gets Kancelled
Faded Stars, Failed Stunts
“Here’s my address book, go get those stars!” – Krusty the Klown According to the schedule on FOX’s website, there’s no new Zombie Simpsons this Sunday (rerun) or next Sunday (rerunning the movie). And while no new Zombie Simpsons is always good news, it also means we’re going to lack for fresh meat around here. (This week’s Crazy Noises should be along in a day or two.) Fortunately, Splitsider stepped into the content gap this morning with an excellent piece by Chris Morgan titled “The Changing Role of Guest Stars on The Simpsons”. The conclusion is a little soft, but…
Crazy Noises: Flaming Moe
“I’ve got to fire that agent.” – Elizabeth Taylor In our ongoing mission to bring you only the shallowest and laziest analysis of Zombie Simpsons, we’re keeping up our Crazy Noises series for Season 22. Since a podcast is so 2004, and video would require a flag, a fern and some folding chairs from the garage, we’ve elected to use the technology that brought the word “emoticon” to the masses: the chatroom. Star Trek image macros are strictly forbidden, unless you have a really good reason why Captain Picard is better than Captain Kirk. This text has been edited for…
Somebody Please Pay Attention To Us!
“So, you want ventriloquism do you? Alright, watch this!” – Krusty the Klown It has been a very long time since I was a regular Sesame Street viewer, even various junior family members I’ve babysat over the years have now outgrown it. On top of that, I have an almost physical revulsion to celebrity “news”. I go out of my way to avoid knowing about the latest brouhaha surrounding famous people of every stripe which, given the pervasiveness of such information, is itself something of a chore. My apathy about this subject typically extends to announcements about the latest celebrity…
Reading Digest: Emmy Apathy Edition (Part II)
“This was a great show, Krusty. You deserve an Emmy for this!” – Bette Midler “Forget it, the Academy hates me. I don’t know why. Bunch of old, know nothing dinosaurs wouldn’t know entertainment if it bit them in the . . . hey hey!” – Krusty the Klown There was a lot of blather on-line this week on account of the Emmy nominations were announced. I don’t care about the Emmys, and since I was passing over lots of links to them I thought this week’s theme would be ignoring the Emmys. That felt a little familiar, so I…
Crazy Noises: The Greatest Story Ever D’ohed
“I don’t like it. He’s got Johnny Carson, Bette Midler and Hugh Hefner! What do we got?” – Gabbo “Ray J. Johnson.” – Arthur Crandall In our continuing mission to bring you only the finest in low class, low brow, and low tech internet Simpsons commentary we’re bringing back our “Crazy Noises” series and applying it to Season 21. Because doing a podcast smacks of effort we’re still using this “chatroom” thing that all the middle schoolers and undercover cops seem to think is so cool. This text has been edited for clarity and spelling (especially on “blaspheming”). The internet…
Worker and Parasite! (Seriously)
The Simpsons are popular the world over. Now they’re getting localized in Georgia (the country, not the American state): Georgian animators are hoping a local television makeover of The Simpsons will mimic the American animated series’ two decades of success. But the show, The Samsonadzes, walks a thin line between originality and flat-out imitation of the world’s best-known cartoon family. […] Launched six weeks ago on Imedi TV, The Samsonadzes feature the bulging eyes, mustard-toned skin, four-fingered hands and character movements reminiscent of their American counterparts. The series’ opening shot — a camera zooming down through the clouds into a…
Friday Link Dump – TV Shows I Never Watched Edition
“I didn’t know you knew Luke Perry.” – Bart Simpson “Pfft. Know him? He’s my worthless half-brother.” – Krusty the Klown “He’s a big TV star.” – Lisa Simpson “Yeah, on FOX.” – Krusty the Klown I watched a lot of television when I was growing up, but even I had my limits and this week we’ve got links to three shows (Melrose Place, Stargate SG-1, Heroes) that I can honestly say I’ve never seen a full episode of. We also check in with the burnt donut from last week, hot chocolate and nuclear power. Oh and we’ve got lots…
Quote of the Day
“I say if it feels good, do it.” – Police Chief Wiggum “All right! (laughs)” – Dr. Hibbert “Don’t snap my undies.” – Police Chief Wiggum
Quote of the Day
“Two wrongs don’t make a right, Bart.” – Lisa Simpson “Yes they do.” – Bart Simpson “No they don’t.” – Lisa Simpson “Yes they do.” – Bart Simpson “No they don’t.” – Lisa Simpson “Yes they do.” – Bart Simpson “Dad!” – Lisa Simpson “Two wrongs make a right, Lisa.” – Homer Simpson
Zombie Simpsons: Countering the Orange Revolution
“So, here’s Eastern Europe’s favorite cat and mouse team: Worker and Parasite!” – Krusty the Klown Here is another way in which Zombie Simpsons is damaging our world. The “Ukrainian State Commission of Morals” (motto: Drinking Vodka and Pissing off Russia since 2004!) has declared that The Simpsons violates moral principals and shouldn’t be shown in the Ukrainian equivalent of primetime: Vasyl Kostytskiy, head of the Commission of Morals, explained that members were analyzing “The Simpsons” at the request of two governmental bodies (the prosecutor’s office and National Television and Radio Broadcasting Council). Their task was to check the show’s compliance…
I’d Rather Watch the Dryer Channel
“I lost to Channel Ocho? What the hell is that?” – Krusty the Klown Good news everybody, that abortion last Sunday was the least watched Zombie Simpsons ever: An extended mid-season break has bitten The Simpsons dearly in the ratings, with Sundays episode ‘Lisa The Drama Queen’ fetching just 5.75 million viewers at 8:00pm, a new all time low for the show. Huzzah. But wait, there’s more! How about some insult to go with that injury? a new American Dad scored 5.73 million viewers at 9.30. American Dad? A first run Simpsons episode is just as interesting to people as Family…