Tag: Lisa Gets an “A”

“Gavin, honey, help mommy pick a cereal. How ’bout Alph-Alphabits.” – Divorcee “Those suck! I hate this store!” – Gavin “But, sweetheart, mommy-” – Divorcee “I hate you, too! I want to live with one of my dads!” – Gavin

“Now, let’s talk rust-proofing. These Colecos’ll rust up on you like that . . . shut up, Gil, close the deal! Close the deal!” – Gil

“Hi, Lisa. Hi, Supernintendo Chalmers.” – Ralph Wiggum Sorry for the very late quote. I was traveling on the day before Thanksgiving. 

“Good Lord, what a dump. It’s not surprising this school was once classified the most dilapidated in all of Missouri. That’s why it was shut down and moved here, brick by brick.” – Superintendent Chalmers

“You know, I run a small academy for lobsters like this one.  We stress tough love, daily chores, and the like.” – Captain McAllister “No!  We’re not sending the lobster away to some snobby boarding school.” – Marge Simpson “Yargh, I understand.  It’s hard to let go.  Tell me this, then:, do you have any spare change?” – Captain McAllister

“Aw, cheer up, Lis.  You got a good grade without even reading the book.  That’s win-win.” – Bart Simpson “Can’t you see the difference between earning something honestly and getting it by fraud?” – Lisa Simpson “Hmm, I suppose, maybe . . . if, uh . . . no.  No, sorry, I thought I had it there.” – Bart Simpson

“Ah, this is my kind of aisle: soy substitutes, whiz-less cheese,. . . oven roasted cud!” – Lisa Simpson “It’s packed in its own drool.” – Squeaky Voiced Teen

“Those are eight dollars a pound, sport.” – Eatie Gourmet’s Lobster Guy “Eight dollars a pound times, say, oh, five pounds is um . . . let’s see . . . how many pounds in a gallon?” – Homer Simpson

“We can buy real periodic tables instead of these promotional ones from Oscar Mayer.” – Principal Skinner “Now, who can tell me the atomic weight of baloneyium?” – Mrs. Krabappel “Ooh, delicious!” – Martin Prince “Correct.  I would also accept snacktacular.” – Mrs. Krabappel

“Mom, can we go Catholic so we can get communion wafers and booze?” – Bart Simpson “No!  No one’s going Catholic.  Three children is enough, thank you.” – Marge Simpson

“Oh, sweetie, you look so much better.  Ready to go back to school?” – Marge Simpson “I don’t know, I mean I could risk it, but-” – Lisa Simpson “No, no, you just stay put.” – Marge Simpson “Wow, you didn’t even feel her forehead.  How do I get that kind of credibility?” – Bart Simpson “With eight years of scrupulous honesty.” – Marge Simpson “Enh, it’s not worth it.” – Bart Simpson [Apologies this was late again.  (And how!)  Still have no internet at home and wow does it fuck everything up.]

“Hey, I can’t go in there!” – Lisa Simpson “Relax, there’s nothing here you didn’t see when Dad boycotted pants.” – Bart Simpson

“I graded this morning’s test over lunch, and most of you did quite well.” – Miss Hoover “I got a B!” – Ralph Wiggum “No, Ralph, that’s an F.  I must’ve spilled some Kahlua.” – Miss Hoover