“Bart, son, you want to play catch?” – Homer Simpson “No.” – Bart Simpson “When a boy doesn’t want to play catch with his old man something is seriously wrong.” – Homer Simpson “I’ll play catch with you, son.” – Abe “Grampa” Simpson “Get the hell out.” – Homer Simpson “I’m gone.” – Abe “Grampa” Simpson
Tag: Lisa’s Sax
Reading Digest: The Content Low of High Summer Edition
“And so, Springfield’s heatwave continues. With today’s temperature exceeding the record for this date, set way back four billion years ago when the Earth was just a ball of molten lava.” – Kent Brockman It may be the summer doldrums, it may be something else, but it’s a short Reading Digest this week (and my apologies to the several of you who’ve e-mailed in and to whom I’ve not responded; been that kind of week). We do have an inordinate number of 10s this week though, a couple of lists and three entries from our old friend Galileo’s “In 10…
Exit Through the Kwik-E-Mart, Or Just Stay Out of It Entirely
“Bart was feeling mighty blue.” – Homer Simpson “It’s a shame what school can do.” – Marge Simpson “For no reason, here’s Apu.” – Apu Nahasapeemapetilon Let me start by saying something nice. It was cool of them to use that one-man rendition of the theme over the end credits. It blew up on-line a few months ago and everybody loved it, and it’s heartening to see someone get recognition for a genuinely creative endeavor like that. Unfortunately, the end credits were about the only part of the episode where there was any spirit of craftsmanship or care. Everything leading…
Quote of the Day
“Homer, I can’t get the baby to burp. Could you try for a while?” – Marge Simpson “No problem, I’ll just give her a sip of beer. C’mon Maggie, it’s Miller time.” – Homer Simpson
Reading Digest: Alumni Success Edition
“I can assure you our preschool is of the highest quality. Over 75% of our graduates go on to first grade.” – Miss Tillingham’s School for Snotty Girls and Mama’s Boys Administrator It’s always nice to see people who worked on The Simpsons continue to do well, and we’ve got several of them this week. Rich Moore (Seasons 1-5, 9), Donick Cary (Seasons 7-11), Greg Daniels (Season 5-9) and Mike Reiss (um, a lot of Seasons) all either have new projects in the works or are just getting some well deserved recognition. There’s also a lot of great references and…
Reading Digest: The Late 80s/Early 90s Strike Back Edition
“It all happened in 1990. Back then, the artist formerly known as Prince was currently known as Prince, Tracy Ullman was entertaining America with songs, sketches, and crudely drawn filler material.” – Homer Simpson This week we’ve got several links to blasts from the past, everything from a great bootleg t-shirt, fake grunge in Tampa, and old political controversies to some moonlighting Groening once did for Apple. There’s even a story that involves a fax machine. How quaint things used to be. There’s also several kinds of usage, a cool looking show coming up in New York City, and some…
Reading Digest: Museums and Galleries Edition
“Forget it, Marge, there is no way I’m spending my Saturdays at a museum. Unless . . . museums don’t have foosball, do they?” – Homer Simpson This week, we’ve got one link to an actual museum, one link to a Bart painting in an art gallery, and an awesome fan made digital gallery that contains a lot of Simpsons characters. There’s also some excellent usage, an English grammar instructional video, a fan made plaque, and the worst non-Grammy award Zombie Simpsons has ever “won”. Enjoy. Ink and the Bottle, Cartoon Museum, London – Cartoons written by drunks and about…
Quote of the Day
“Now son, on your first day of school I’d like to pass along the words of advice my father gave me.” – Homer Simpson “Homer, you’re dumb as a mule and twice as ugly. If a strange man offers you a ride, I say take it.” – Abe Simpson
Crazy Noises: Lisa Simpson, This Isn’t Your Life
“I’ll give you the address of a nice preschool.” – Dr. J. Loren Pryor In our ongoing mission to bring you only the shallowest and laziest analysis of Zombie Simpsons, we’re keeping up our Crazy Noises series for Season 22. Since a podcast is so 2004, and video would require a flag, a fern and some folding chairs from the garage, we’ve elected to use the technology that brought the word “emoticon” to the masses: the chatroom. Star Trek image macros are strictly forbidden, unless you have a really good reason why Captain Picard is better than Captain Kirk. This…
Quote of the Day
“Mr. and Mrs. Simpson, there’s nothing to be alarmed about. Public school can be intimidating to a young child, particularly one with as many flamboyantly homosexual tendencies as your son.” – Dr. J Loren Pryor “Bart’s gay?” – Marge Simpson “Bart? I, oh, wrong file.” – Dr. J Loren Pryor
Crazy Noises: The Color Yellow
“Oh, I know this story. The year is nineteen-aught-six, the President is the divine Miss Sarah Bernhardt, and all over America people were doing a dance called the Funky Grandpa!” – Abe “Grandpa” Simpson In our continuing mission to bring you only the finest in low class, low brow, and low tech internet Simpsons commentary we’re bringing back our “Crazy Noises” series and applying it to Season 21. Because doing a podcast smacks of effort we’re still using this “chatroom” thing that all the middle schoolers and undercover cops seem to think is so cool. This text has been edited…