“Set sail for the Frying Dutchman!” – Captain McAllister “Aye-aye, captain!” – Homer Simpson In our continuing mission to bring you only the finest in low class, low brow, and low tech internet Simpsons commentary we’re bringing back our “Crazy Noises” series and applying it to Season 21. Because doing a podcast smacks of effort we’re still using this “chatroom” thing that all the middle schoolers and undercover cops seem to think is so cool. This text has been edited for clarity and spelling (especially on “camouflaged”). The above quote and image have almost nothing to do with the discussion below. I just wanted to put it next to this: And, of course, I could’ve also put it next to Gulp-n-Blow, the Buzzing Sign Diner, the Who’s To Know Motel, or any of the other funny and clever establishment names the The Simpsons came up with when it was still on the air. The low give-a-shit level is one of the few constants of Zombie Simpsons, and it shines through in every single episode. Mad Jon: Let’s do this so I can kill the taste with beer and Halo. Charlie Sweatpants: Can I point something horrible out? Mad Jon: You sure can Charlie Sweatpants: "I’m the real Walt Warren", was I the only one who got a massive flashback to perhaps the most famous Zombie Simpsons moment ever, the Armin Tamzarian reveal? Mad Jon: Every moment of that episode was a direct ripoff of another episode. It wasn’t even camouflaged Charlie Sweatpants: Of all the horrible plot twists and stupidities you’d think they’d never bring back . . . Dave: I’ve long since repressed Armin Tamzarian, but I see your point Charlie Sweatpants: Half of this episode was recycled. Mad Jon: I would say more than that. Charlie Sweatpants: That was just the one part that was recycled from a shitty episode. Dave: Recycled, repurposed, and incredibly dull. Mad Jon: Everything from the Flanders family to the five corners to the feet revelation and everything in between was already done. AND Mad Jon: They had the gall to mention the writer’s creativity. Charlie Sweatpants: When did they do that? Mad Jon: There was a joke that made reference to crushing creativity that made me choke, but I think I have blocked out the actual quote… Charlie Sweatpants: I’ll take your word for it, verifying it would mean watching this again and that would retard my efforts to forget it completely. Mad Jon: You’re better off not trying to figure it out. Charlie Sweatpants: I agree completely. I’m also not going to try to figure out how they thought the face coming off thing was funny twice. Mad Jon: The only thing that made me crack a smile other than the occasional thought of suicide was the joke in the beginning about another family moving to Detroit. And when did Ruth Powers move? Charlie Sweatpants: Enh. Got me, but since when would that matter anyway? Mad Jon: I…
Tag: The Bob Next Door
Synergy Develops Stockholm Syndrome
“Ahh, the boy is fine, so far. I taught him to play the spoons.” – Charles “Big” Daddy I think IGN is beginning to yearn for the freedom of summer. This week’s corporate fanboy rant is really a stunner, even by their standards. It’s not just high praise, it’s a justification, a plea that yes, Zombie Simpsons is indeed good. Most of these reviews eagerly lap up whatever Zombie Simpsons left on the rug, but this wants to argue that it’s a good thing to shit on said rug: A lot of the best moments from "The Bob Next Door" came from our familiarity with the character, his love of operettas being just one. For IGN, it’s not enough to say that all the drawn out and recycled jokes were great, it’s that the very act of drawing out and recycling jokes makes them great. Anyway, I had to do some serious synergy exorcising on this one, but I think I got it all. Enjoy. Now this is the Bob we’ve know and love come to expect. His last two major appearances, 2005’s "The Italian Bob" and 2007’s "Funeral for a Fiend" did not live up to the standard set by so many other great Sideshow Bob episodes. "The Bob Next Door" was a funny obliterated those standards in a black hole of suck that proves that this show will never return to form and that proved there’s still a lot to enjoy when new ways for The Simpsons Zombie Simpsons to pit exploit the once awesome idea of Bob and Bart against each other. The episode, of course, didn’t come right out at the beginning and make it all about Bob advertise just how bottom dredgingly awful it would be. The majority of the first act gave us the Simpson typically lifeless Zombie Simpson spin on the current economic crisis. Like many local governments, Springfield was in major financial difficulty. Homer’s vision of Mayor Quimby’s "cooked books" and "fudge numbers" was the best misrepresentation of what he heard since kind of drawn out, clock eating “joke” that’s replaced quick lines like his take on Mr. Burns’ "open-faced club, a sand wedge" request. Other references also brought laughs reeked of runtime desperation, including Krusty Burger taking up where the city’s road kill pick-up left off, and folks leaving Springfield to find a better life in Detroit. And then Iceland blamed Homer for their financial collapse; this too made no sense, involved pointless exposition and took much too long. "At least we’ll always have Beowulf." "That’s not us." "No! No!" The situation only got better managed to get worse when Bob arrived. Or was it Bob? A new neighbor moved in next door to the Simpsons and everyone was smitten except for Bart and the audience. He We recognized the man’s voice as the one and only Sideshow Bob. I thought Homer and Marge rationalizing the familiar voice was a fun shout out to Kelsey Grammer pathetic attempt to cover up…
Well, At Least They Didn’t Make a “Face”book Joke
“I really wish they wouldn’t scream.” – Itchy & Scratchy Land Technician There’s not much to be said about an episode that spent most of its time expositing its many loopy story conceits. Of course, in between bouts of joke free exposition there were any number of recycled premises, sloppy scene staging, and all of the rest of the usual problems. Four year olds who have to pee very badly can tell a funnier and more coherent story than this. Happily, there’s only one episode left before we’re free for the summer. The numbers are in and though they remain atrociously low they still represent an improvement. 6.26 million people remembered why they never bought Face/Off on DVD, even from the $3 bargain bin. That’s the highest number since the 20th anniversary special and it’s still lower than all but a handful of Season 20 episodes. I’ve run out of creative ways to say the same thing: Season 21 would easily be the least watched season were it not for the 20th anniversary stuff. This week’s numbers fit right into that pattern.
Sunday Preview: “The Bob Next Door”
While Charlie tends to his liver this morning, I have the pleasure of bringing you another Sunday Preview. Tonight’s Zombie Simpsons seems like a routine Sideshow Bob episode, except that we all know these types of episodes stopped being funny after “Brother From Another Series.” This latest installment is called “The Bob Next Door” and SNPP tells us that Bart is so convinced that the new next-door neighbor is Sideshow Bob that Marge takes Bart to the prison to prove that Bob is still there. Again, nothing remarkably vile. One does have to admire the writers’ gall, however, in wringing the Bart/Sideshow Bob relationship dry, especially when they haven’t been able to add anything new to the mix in years. Then again, that’s been the overriding will of the show for over a decade now. In other words, move right along, nothing to see here. (Thanks to Simpsons Channel for giving us the promo pic to defile.)