Tag: Simpson and Delilah

“Okay, the colors of the Italian flag are red, white, and what?” – Grade School Challenge Host “Blue!” – Bart Simpson “Yellow!” – Homer Simpson “Green.” – Selma Bouvier “Orange! Red!” – Bart Simpson “Green.” – Patty Bouvier “Purple!” – Bart Simpson “Red! White! Black! Green!” – Homer Simpson “Green.” – Grade School Challenge Contestant “I was right!” – Homer Simpson

“Mr. Burns, it is my sad duty to report that one of your executives has bilked the company insurance plan out of a thousand dollars.” – Mr. Smithers “What? Blast his hide to Hades! And I was going to buy that ivory back scratcher.” – C.M. Burns

“Good morning, Springfield! Good morning, Mr. and Mrs. Winfield!” – Homer Simpson “Why don’t you get a haircut, you hippie!” – Mr. Winfield “Good morning, Moe’s Tavern!” – Homer Simpson “Hey, it’s the President.” – Barney Gumble “Good morning everybody!” – Homer Simpson “Good morning!” – Funeral Mourners

“You know, some women find bald men quite virile.” – Marge Simpson “Marge, weren’t you listening? This is a ‘miracle breakthrough’, not one of these cheapo sucker deals.” – Homer Simpson

“This bald man has no ideas.” – Male Executive #1 “If this is a joke, I’m not laughing.” – Male Executive #2 “Some nerve, telling us how to run the plant. He doesn’t even have hair.” – Female Executive

“Boy…must…die!” – Homer Simpson “I love you, Dad!” – Bart Simpson “D’oh! . . . Dirty trick.” – Homer Simpson

“I don’t have a thousand bucks!  But you do, don’t you, Marge?  You do!  You do!  You’ve been squirreling it away, haven’t you?  Saving it for a rainy day?  That’s what you said, right?  Right?  Right!” – Homer Simpson “Homer!” – Marge Simpson “Dad is taking this in a less than heroic fashion.” – Lisa Simpson

“A thousand bucks?  I can’t afford that!” – Homer Simpson “Well, we do have a product which is more in your price range, however, I must assure you that any hair growth you experience while using it will be purely coincidental.” – Hair Doctor

“A lot of you would think I was crazy if I did this.” – Homer Simpson “He’s crazy!” – C.M. Burns

“Hello, Homie, how’s my big, important executive?” – Marge Simpson “Oh, Marge, every woman I interview for the secretary job makes kissy faces at me.” – Homer Simpson “Hmmm.” – Marge Simpson “Hello, Mr. Simpson, I’m Karl.” – Karl “He sounds good.  Hire him.” – Marge Simpson

“Our first issue, sir, is our low productivity and record high worker accident rate.” – Mr. Smithers “Any suggestions?” – C.M. Burns “A round of layoffs might wake up the idiots.” – Male Executive “We could put caffeine in the water cooler.” – Female Executive “Those are my ideas!  You people don’t think, you regurgitate!” – C.M. Burns

“And what does my little girl want?” – Homer Simpson “An absence of mood swings and some stability in my life.” – Lisa Simpson “Uh, how bout a pony?” – Homer Simpson “Okay!” – Lisa Simpson

  “This is hopeless, none of these cretins deserves a promotion.” – C.M. Burns “It’s in the union contract, sir, one token promotion from within per year.” – Mr. Smithers

“Brilliant.  Who could ever have imagined that Simpson’s sweeping reforms would pay off so quickly?” – C.M. Burns “You know, sir, accidents decreased by exactly the number that Simpson himself is known or suspected to have caused last month, and our output level was just as high during Simpson’s last vacation.” – Mr. Smithers “My dear, tired old Smithers, do I detect a note of jealousy?” – C.M. Burns