Tag: Grampa vs. Sexual Inadequacy

“Listen to this: Unexplainable behavior, individuals acting in a secretive fashion are often involved with UFOs or other paranormal phenomena, e.g. telephone explosions.” – Bart Simpson “Geeze, if it’s in a book, it’s gotta be true.” – Milhouse van Houten

“There she is, the old Radiation King! You’d park yourself right there and watch for hours on end.” – Abe “Grampa” Simpson

“We got a lotta tonic to sell and a lotta towns to visit! Frigid Falls, Mount Seldom, Lake Flaccid…” – Abe “Grampa” Simpson “Great, I’m gonna be stuck in the car all weekend with that wheezy windbag.” – Homer Simpson “And that’s what’s wrong with Bart’s generation. Now, as for your generation…” – Abe “Grampa” Simpson

“This isn’t very erotic. I think an actual a utility room.” – Marge Simpson “No, honey, it’s a romantic fantasy. I imagine I’m the janitor, and you’re . . . the janitor’s wife, who has to live with me in the utility room.” – Homer Simpson “Don’t mind me, folks. Just need to get the old wet-dry vac.” – Aphrodite Inn Guy

“Hey, Marge, this guy looks like Apu!” – Homer Simpson

“Someday you’ll thank me for all this scary love. But now I’ve got to go somewhere and do some serious thinking.” – Homer Simpson “I’m sure he meant to say ‘serious drinking’.” – Bart Simpson “That’s what I assumed.” – Lisa Simpson

“Dad, how come you never gave me any encouragement? Maybe I could’ve been something more than I am, like a travel agent . . . to a great scientist. Or the inventor of a hilarious refrigerator alarm.” – Homer Simpson

“What’s going on?  Where are all the grown-ups?” – Milhouse van Houten “Who cares?  With no adults around, I run this city! . . . Uh, carry on.” – Nelson Muntz

“Hurry up!  We got a lot of tonic to sell and a lot of towns to visit: Frigid Falls, Mount Seldom, Lake Flaccid.” – Abe “Grampa” Simpson

“Sir, uh, hello, sir?  Yes, you look like a man who needs help satisfying his wife.” – Homer Simpson

“Kids, your Daddy and his Daddy are involved in a very sticky, nutty, chewy, chocolaty . . . put it away, boy! . . . situation.” – Homer Simpson

“Where are my pants?” – Homer Simpson “You threw them out the window in a fit of passion.  You said you were never going to need them again.” – Marge Simpson “Oh, hurry, Neddy.  They’re awful.” – Maude Flanders “You just be ready with that garbage bag.” – Ned Flanders

“Legend has it, my great-grand-pappy stumbled upon this recipe when he was trying to invent a cheap substitute for holy water.” – Abe “Grampa” Simpson

“Oh, mama!  This is finally really happening.  After years of disappointment with get rich quick schemes, I know I’m gonna get rich with this scheme, and quick!” – Homer Simpson