Tag: The Twisted World of Marge Simpson

“What’s going on outside?” – Lisa Simpson “Oh, it’s just a mob war. Go back to sleep, honey.” – Marge Simpson

“Ladies and gentlemen, a winner has been chosen for today’s giveaway. And the 1997 Pontiac Astrowagon goes to the fan sitting in seat number zero-zero-zero-one, C. Montgomery Burns.” – Old Announcer “And the fans do not like this one bit.” – Young Announcer “And here come the pretzels!” – Old Announcer “Oh, no! No, don’t do that! You’re supposed to be tasting them!” – Marge Simpson “Hall of Famer Whitey Ford now on the field. Pleading with the crowd for some kind of sanity.” – Young Announcer “Uh-oh, and a barrage of pretzels now knocking Whitey unconscious.” – Old Announcer…

“I had that dream again.” – Abe “Grampa” Simpson

“Forgiveness, please.” – The Little Guy

“Next, blanket your community with flyers. A phony tickertape parade will help you avoid littering laws.” – Frank Ormond “Welcome back, space girl!” – Chief Wiggum

“An automatic garage door opener makes you feel like you’re working in a futuristic wonder world.” – Frank Ormand

“And then they gave me back my five hundred dollar investment and kicked me out of the club.” – Marge Simpson “Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, back up a bit, Marge. When are the pancakes coming in the mail?” – Homer Simpson

“Well, I guess Macy’s and Gimbels learned to live side by side.” – Marge Simpson “Gimbels is gone, Marge, long gone.  You’re Gimbals.” – Agnes Skinner

“Now, you’re ready to make pretzels.  Open your bag of ingredients . . . ugh, check for . . . millipedes, ugh.” – Frank Ormand

“You’re my last hope.  I’ve never reached out to you before, but my wife is in your hour of need.  Your help could make all the difference in the world.” – Homer Simpson “Okay.” – Fat Tony “See, boss?  I told you that ad in the church bulletin would pay off.” – Louie

“What’s all that commotion?  Why it’s one of those pretzel wagons the movie stars are always talking about.” – Homer Simpson “Here?  At our plant?” – Lenny

“You sound like you’re ready to become your own boss in the exciting world of frame nudging!  Yes, for a minimal franchise fee, you’ll receive a pair of straightening gloves, a canister of wall lubricant, and a booklet of the most commonly asked questions you will hear, including ‘Who are you?’ and ‘What are you doing here?’.” – Frame Nudging Guy

“Hello, Helen.” – Marge Simpson “Marge.” – Helen Lovejoy “Edna.” – Marge Simpson “Marge.” – Edna Krabappel “Uh . . . oh.” – Marge Simpson “Oh, my name is Agnes, and you know it’s Agnes!  It means lamb, lamb of God!” – Agnes Skinner (Sorry this went up late.  Schedule screw up on my part.) 

“Well, that’s the miracle of the franchise.  You get all the equipment and know-how you need, plus a familiar brand name people trust.  You’ll be on a rocket ride to the Moon!  And while you’re there, would you pick up some of that nice, green moon money for me, Royce McCutcheon?” – Royce McCutcheon “No deal, McCutcheon!  That moon money is mine!” – Homer Simpson