Tag: Bart Gets an Elephant

“Looks like those clowns in Congress did it again. What a bunch of clowns.” – DJ 3000 “How does he keep up with the news like that?” – Bill

“D’oh!” – Homer Simpson “A deer!” – Lisa Simpson “A female deer!” – Marge Simpson

“Get a rope, Bart!” – Marge Simpson “No, that’s okay. I’m pretty sure I can struggle my way out. First, I’ll just reach in and pull my legs out. Now I’ll pull my arms out with my face.” – Homer Simpson

“Stop remembering TV and get back to work!” – Marge Simpson “What’s the point of all this cleaning? Are we so vain?” – Homer Simpson

“That animal of yours is certainly bad tempered.” – Helen Lovejoy “Yeah, well, you’d be grumpy too if you were taken out of your natural habitat and gawked at by a bunch of slack jawed yokels.” – Lisa Simpson “Hey, ma, look at that pointy haired-ed little girl!” – Cletus

“So, isn’t that what we’re all asking in our own lives: where’s my elephant? I know that’s what I’ve been asking.” – Kent Brockman

“Look at this, Marge, fifty-eight dollars and all of it profit!  I’m the smartest businessman in the world.” – Homer Simpson “Stampy’s food bill today was three hundred dollars.” – Marge Simpson “Marge, please, don’t humiliate me in front of the money.” – Homer Simpson

“I think you’re taking unfair advantage of my generous offer.” – Moe “Shut up!” – Homer Simpson

“Alright, I’ll be back in the morning to pick up Stampy.” – Mr. Blackheart “Here’s the keys.” – Homer Simpson “Elephants don’t have keys.” – Mr. Blackheart “I’ll just keep these, then.” – Homer Simpson

“Gosh, I thought he’d be happier in his true habitat.” – Marge Simpson “Oh, I think he is.” – Wildlife Refuge Guy “Then why is he attacking all those other elephants?” – Marge Simpson “Well, animals are a lot like people, Mrs. Simpson.  Some of them act badly because they’ve had a hard life or have been mistreated.  But, like people, some of them are just jerks.  Stop that, Mr. Simpson.” – Wildlife Refuge Guy Happy 20th Anniversary to “Bart Gets an Elephant”.  Original airdate 31 March 1994.

“I’m alive!  I’m alive!  And I owe it all to this feisty feline.” – Homer Simpson “Dad, ‘feline’ means cat.” – Lisa Simpson “Elephant, honey, it’s an elephant.” – Homer Simpson

“Mr. Simpson, I think you’ll find this amount more than fair.” – Mr. Blackheart “Dad, I think he’s an ivory dealer.  His boots are ivory, his hat is ivory, and I’m pretty sure that check is ivory.” – Lisa Simpson “Lisa, a guy who has lots of ivory is less likely to hurt Stampy than a guy whose ivory supplies are low.” – Homer Simpson

“It’s the four elephants of the apocalypse!” – Ned Flanders “That’s horsemen, Ned.” – Maude Flanders “Well, getting closer.” – Ned Flanders