♫”Under the sea! Under the sea! There’ll be no accusations Just friendly crustaceans! Under the sea!”♫
Tag: Homer Badman
Quote of the Day
“Hurry, Marge, if we get there early we can get our pictures taken with the two surviving Musketeers!” – Homer Simpson
Makeup Quote of the Day
“Of course, there’s no way to see into the Simpson home without some kind of infrared heat-sensitive camera. So, let’s turn it on. Now, this technology is new to me, but I’m pretty sure that’s Homer Simpson in the oven, rotating slowly. His body temperature has risen to over four hundred degrees. He’s literally stewing in his own juices!” – Kent Brockman
Quote of the Day
“Uh, you’re gonna have to put some sugar on that celery or get out, ma’am.” – Candy Convention Security Guy
Behind Us Forever: Looking for Mr. Goodbart
“Mr. Goodbar to the front desk. The front desk is looking for Mr. Goodbar.” – Candy Convention PA Season 28 has only a few episodes left, and the most distinct thing I can say about “Looking for Mr. Goodbart” is that it is one of them. They once again switched to a voiceover narration for (some of) the exposition, there was a subplot about Homer and Lisa playing a barely renamed Pokemon Go thing, and Bart spent much of the episode being nice to old ladies before he learned a lesson about it, or something. As usual, none of it…
Quote of the Day
“Are you hugging the TV?” – Homer Simpson “No!” – Bart & Lisa Simpson
Quote of the Day
“There are only forty-nine stars on that flag.” – Marge Simpson “I’ll be deep in the cold, cold ground before I recognize Missoura!” – Abe “Grampa” Simpson
Quote of the Day
“I don’t know Homer Simpson, I never met Homer Simpson, or had any contact with him, but . . . I’m sorry, I can’t go on” – Crying Woman “That’s okay, your tears say more than real evidence ever could.” – Talk Show Host
Quote of the Day
“C’mon, I’m a decent guy!” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“This is hour fifty-seven of our live, round-the-clock coverage outside the Simpson estate. Remember, by the way, to tune in tonight at eight o’clock for highlights of today’s vigil, including when the garbage man came, and when Marge Simpson put the cat out. Possibly because it was harassed, we don’t know.” – Kent Brockman
Reading Digest: Fan Made Treats Edition
“My only hope is this homemade Prozac . . . Hmm, needs more ice cream.” – Homer Simpson I’ve long been of the belief that the stuff ordinary fans come up with is far, far superior to all that crappy merchandise FOX allows to be pumped out. This week we have several kick ass examples, including two that you can eat, a cake and a chocolate Homer. In addition to that, we’ve got a couple of election related links, the original Monkey’s Paw, a couple of lists and a Lego Flanders. Enjoy. The Simpson’s Ralph Wiggum Cut-Out Cake – Pictures of…
Reading Digest: FXX Is *Really* Bad At TV Edition
“But those shows all look so crummy.” – Homer Simpson “We could dress it up a bit. We could bring a fern, and a folding chair from the garage, and the most decorative thing of all: the truth.” – Marge Simpson FXX got a lot of good press out of this Simpsons marathon thing. Then they went and stretched the image in a way so dumb that I initially didn’t even consider it a possibility: Oof. As plenty of people on Twitter have pointed out, that looks atrocious. Maybe you don’t want to just have black bars on either side,…
Quote of the Day
“As you can see, I have created a lemon ball so sour it can only be safely contained in a magnetic field. The candy, known as 77X42 – where the hell is the candy?” – Professor Frink “I don’t know.” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“What’s that?” – Homer Simpson “That is the rarest Gummy of them all: the Gummy Venus de Milo, carved by Gummy artisans who work exclusively in the medium of Gummy.” – Candy Convention Guy
Quote of the Day
“Tonight on Rock Bottom, we go undercover at a sex farm for sex hookers.” – Godfrey Jones “I keep tellin’ ya, I just grow sorghum here.” – Farmer “Uh-huh, and where are the hookers?” – Reporter “Round back. . . . Oops.” – Farmer
Quote of the Day
“Hey, kids, lots of candy left for breakfast!” – Homer Simpson “Ugh.” – Bart & Lisa Simpson “Why don’t we give it to some needy children then?” – Marge Simpson “Unh-ugh.” – Bart & Lisa Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Now, here are some results from our phone-in poll. Ninety-five percent of the people believe Homer Simpson is guilty. Now, of course, this is just a television poll, which is not legally binding, unless Proposition 304 passes, and we all pray it will.” – Kent Brockman
Oh Hell, Let’s Move the Town Again
“Homer, that’s your solution to everything, to move under the sea. It’s not going to happen!” – Marge Simpson “Not with that attitude.” – Homer Simpson Give Zombie Simpsons credit for consistency, for the 500th episode they served up a perfectly banal rendition of their usual hacktacular schlock. They recycled two old ideas (family leaves Springfield, rebuild the town), had an illogical, meaningless and irrelevant celebrity voicing himself, and left plot threads hanging all over the place. No real reason is given for why the town suddenly decides they miss the Simpsons, nothing about the “Outlands” makes sense, either as…
Compare & Contrast: Conventioneering
“Sorry kids, but this is the one event I want my darling wife by my side.” – Homer Simpson “Oh, well thank you, Homer. But take one of the kids.” – Marge Simpson “Marge, they can’t carry enough candy! They have puny little muscles, not big ropey ones like you.” – Homer Simpson Like last week, there are quite a few aspects of “The Food Wife” which were done better on actual episodes of The Simpsons. There was the family trying out ethnic food, which made more sense and had more to do with the rest of the episode in…
Quote of the Day
“Homer, are all these pockets necessary?” – Marge Simpson “They wouldn’t be if you were willing to sit in a hollowed out wheelchair.” – Homer Simpson