“That makes twenty-two to sixteen.” – Homer Simpson
Tag: Lisa The Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Wesley, get Momma’s pryin’ bar.” – Mrs. Wiggum
Quote of the Day
“My name is Lisa Simpson. I’m supposed to talk to you about Proposition 305.” – Lisa Simpson “Moochin’ war widows.” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Mr. McClure, what does D.N.A. stand for?” – Billy Happy 20th Anniversary to “Lisa the Simpson”! Original airdate 8 March 1998.
Scrounging for Praise
“This is your great uncle Chet. Go ahead, Chet, tell her what you do.” – Homer Simpson “I run an unsuccessful shrimp company.” – Chet Simpson “Oh. But you run it, right?” – Homer Simpson “Oh yeah.” – Chet Simpson I’m aware that there was a new Zombie Simpsons this week, but I’m out here in the desert helping a friend put a roof on his (second!) kickass, off-the-grid solar house. That’s it in the above picture, and as you can probably guess by the remoteness, internet access here is spotty at best. So I’m probably not gonna get to…
Quote of the Day
“So, all the Simpson women turn out okay?” – Lisa Simpson “That’s right, sweetie, the defective Simpson gene is on the Y-chromosome, so only men are affected.” – Dr. Simpson, Chief of Complicated Surgery at the Invasacare Clinic
Quote of the Day
“Authorities believe the wave of towel snappings will get worse before it gets better.” – Kent Brockman
Quote of the Day
“Maybe I can’t concentrate because of all your cooties!” – Lisa Simpson “It’s called lice, and it’s nothing to be ashamed of.” – Milhouse van Houten
Quote of the Day
“Dear Log, Can it be true? Do all Simpsons go through process of dumbening? Wait, that’s not how you spell dumbening? Wait, dumbening isn’t even a word.” – Lisa Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Oh, Lisa’s right; we’re nothing but a big bunch of losers. Show’s over, folks. Go home.” – Homer Simpson “What about our five bucks?” – Unsuccessful Simpson Male “You get it after you leave. Now get out of here!” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“You look pretty successful.” – Homer Simpson “Thanks. I play a millionaire at parties . . . at least, I’d like to.” – Male Simpson Relative
Quote of the Day
“I’m looking for something in an after dinner burrito.” – Homer Simpson “You’ll have it in forty-five seconds, sir.” – Apu Nahasapeemapetilon
Behind Us Forever: The War of Art
“Oh, Kenny, look at the interplay of light and shadow. It’s so luminous and vibrant!” – Lisa Simpson “Thanks, Lisa, I painted that one. The real one’s in my garage.” – Kenny the Museum Guard If there is one topic on which Zombie Simpsons has a thorough and well practiced knowledge, it is imitating great art. That didn’t help them keep “The War of Art” from being a meandering, exposition filled wasteland, of course, but it does add a nice level of unintentional meta-irony that will help you through what passes for the third act. By the time Max von…
Quote of the Day
“Very nice, Janie. Good use of pipe cleaners, Becky. Don’t open it, Ralph. I’ll just give you a C-minus.” – Ms. Hoover “Yay!” – Ralph Wiggum
Quote of the Day
“Son, I represent a group of oil tycoons who make foolish purchases. We already bought us a stained glass bathrobe and the world’s fattest racehorse. Now we need your ice man.” – Rich Texan “Oh, no, I could never sell him. He’s like a frozen father to me.” – Apu Nahasapeemapetilon “How much for just the head?” – Rich Texan
Quote of the Day
“What do you do, Dr. . . Simpson?” – Homer Simpson “Doctor?” – Lisa Simpson “That’s right, I’m chief of complicated surgery at the invasa-care clinic.” – Dr. Simpson
Reading Digest: Artistic Crossover Edition
“Aw, they just came for the buffalo wings. But you really got through to me.” – Lisa Simpson “Oh, good. I figure, if you’ve got something special to say, you have to share it with the world.” – Jazz Musician “Yeah, while you still can. Thanks.” – Lisa Simpson “Damn, that felt like a sale.” – Jazz Musician This week’s Reading Digest is loaded with Simpsons inspired pieces of creativity. We’ve got everything from a small drawing to a gigantic sand sculpture, as well as cheap laughs and honest-to-Jebus highfalutin music of the choral and jazz varieties. There’s also a…
Quote of the Day
“We now return to ‘When Buildings Collapse’ on Non Stop Fox!” – FOX Announcer
Quote of the Day
“This is crazy. Just because you and Dad and Bart went downhill doesn’t mean it’s gonna happen to me. Does it?” – Lisa Simpson “Sure. But it doesn’t mean you can’t live a long and pointless life.” – Abe “Grampa” Simpson
That Is So 1991
“Please alter my pants as fashion dictates.” – Jasper (as read by Homer Simpson) Last month, when I was taking all those frame grabs of the seated Cerberus that was the three housewives from “Moms I’d Like to Forget”, I was struck by how modern and colorful their outfits were compared to Marge’s. The next week I noticed something similar in “Flaming Moe”. Characters who’ve been around a long time, like Smithers and Patty, look really out of place next to the one-and-done guests. The more I thought about it, the more it occurred to me that this happens in…