“I just want the whole world to know that this was a really crappy camp. Can I say crappy on TV?” – Bart Simpson “Yes, on this network you can.” – Kent Brockman
Tag: Kamp Krusty
Quote of the Day
“My chunky brothers, gorge yourselves at the trough of freedom!” – Bart Simpson “Ahh, sweet, nourishing gruel!” – Martin Prince
Double Secret Makeup Quote of the Day
“Ladies and gentlemen, I’ve been to Vietnam, Afghanistan, and Iraq, and I can say without hyperbole that this is a million times worse than all of them put together.” – Kent Brockman
Quote of the Day
“You’re serving us gruel?” – Lisa Simpson “Not quite. This is Krusty Brand Imitation Gruel. Nine out of ten orphans can’t tell the difference.” – Dolph
Quote of the Day
“Alright you balls of pan drippings, I want to see Crisco coming out of those pores! We’re not leaving until this Christmas ham gives me a pull-up!” – Imagine Enhancement Camp Counselor
Quote of the Day
“I thought you said you broke their spirits!” – Mr. Black “We did!” – Jimbo Jones “You broke nothing!” – Mr. Black “Let’s get ’em!” – Bart Simpson “To the hydrofoil!” – Mr. Black
Behind Us Forever: Kamp Krustier
“Krusty, this camp was a nightmare. They fed us gruel. They forced us to make wallets for export. And one of the campers was eaten by a bear!” – Bart Simpson “Oh my God!” – Krusty the Klown “Well, actually, the bear just ate his hat.” – Bart Simpson “Was it a nice hat?” – Krusty the Klown “Oh yeah.” – Bart Simpson “Oh my God!” – Krusty the Klown It will come as no surprise to readers of this site that Zombie Simpsons is dumb and derivative. It’s been coasting off the legacy of The Simpsons for well over a…
Quote of the Day
“I don’t think I’d be any kind of a father if you got Ds and I let you go to Kamp Krusty.” – Homer Simpson “But Dad!” – Bart Simpson “Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now, quiet, they’re about to announce the lottery numbers.” – Homer Simpson “17.” – Radio “D’oh!” – Homer Simpson “32.” – Radio “D’oh!” – Homer Simpson “5.” – Radio “D’oh.” – Homer Simpson “8.” – Radio “Woo-hoo!” – Homer Simpson “47.” – Radio “D’oh!” – Homer Simpson
Reading Digest: Flock of Vultures and Parasites Edition
“Is it true you attempted suicide when you heard the news?” – Vulture #1 “Are you and Princess Di just friends?” – Vulture #2 “You people make me sick! You’re vultures! Where were you when I sang at Farm Aid? Out of my way, you parasites! I said out of my way!” – Krusty the Klown This week we’ve got four (count’ em four!) links to Vulture, which is doing yeoman’s work to promote the new season of Zombie Simpsons, which starts, ugh, on Sunday. The first one is by far the most interesting, but all of them have their moments,…
Quote of the Day
“Point and game Becker. And will the harlequin in the third row please keep his voice down.” – Wimbledon Announcer “Sorry, folks, uh, sorry, your majesty.” – Krusty the Klown Happy birthday Brad Bird!
Quote of the Day
“Somebody put a torch to these permanent records . . . quickly now.” – Principal Skinner
Quote of the Day
“Before I go to camp, I’ll need boosters for malaria, German measles, encephalitis, Hansen’s disease-” – Lisa Simpson “Oh, now I’m afraid what we have here is an advanced case of hypochondria. There’s only one known cure: a lollypop.” – Dr. Hibbert “Don’t patronize me, Doctor.” – Lisa Simpson
Quote of the Day
“I’m gonna make it all up to you. I’m gonna show you kids the time of your life. Get ready for two weeks at the happiest place on Earth, Tijuana!” – Krusty the Klown
Quote of the Day
“We’ll see you when you get back from image enhancement camp.” – Mr. Prince “Spare me your euphemisms! It’s fat camp for daddy’s chubby little secret!” – Martin Prince “You promised you wouldn’t make a scene.” – Mr. Prince
Quote of the Day
“Kamp Krusty is built on an actual Indian burial ground; we’ve got archery, wallet making, the whole megillah . . . and for you fat kids, my exclusive program of diet and ridicule will really get results.” – Krusty the Klown Happy 20th anniversary to “Kamp Krusty”! Original airdate: 24 September 1992.
Quote of the Day
“Bart, where’s your bathing suit?” – Marge Simpson “I’m gonna swim nekkid.” – Bart Simpson “You’re what?” – Marge Simpson “Aw, sure, they’ll be a couple of uptight counselors who won’t dig the Bart philosophy, but I feel the human body is a thing of beauty.” – Bart Simpson “Marge, am I crazy or is my back getting hairier?” – Homer Simpson
Get Rid of the Little Bastards
“Don’t look in my closet! In fact, stay out of my room altogether.” – Bart Simpson “If the pets die, don’t replace them. I’ll know!” – Lisa Simpson The A.V. Club’s massive and (very) long running series of reviews of what they call “Classic” episodes picked up this week with “Kamp Krusty”. The article is justifiably glowing (“still feels bracingly dark and sharp and uncompromising”), and it makes much of the wonderfully subversive theme of kids revolting against the unjust and incompetent adults who run their lives. But it glosses over one of the best scenes in the episode: when…
Quote of the Day
“Well, William, another school year gone by.” – Principal Skinner “And may I say, a job well done, sir.” – Groundskeeper Willie “Well, back to work then. Make sure to give those toilets a good scrubbing. We want the old girls sparkling when I get back.” – Principal Skinner “Aye, sir . . . ya silk wearing buttercup.” – Groundskeeper Willie
Quote of the Day
“Wait a minute, you didn’t learn how World War II ended! . . . We won!” – Teacher “U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A!” – Students “Mmm, I haven’t seen such unfettered hurly-burly since the fall of Saigon.” – Principal Skinner
Quote of the Day
“Mrs. Krabappel, in figuring out my final grades I hope you’ll note that all of my textbooks are being returned in excellent condition, in some cases still in their original wrappings.” – Bart Simpson “Duly noted.” – Mrs. Krabappel