“Bart, leave that crowbar here! You know I don’t like you prying and jimmying.” – Marge Simpson
Tag: The PTA Disbands
Makeup Quote of the Day
“Alright, the battlefield is just a half mile ahead. Begin braking procedure!” – Principal Skinner
Quote of the Day
“Lousy teachers, trying to palm off our kids on us.” – Homer Simpson “But, Dad, by striking they’re trying to affect a change in management so that they can be happier and more productive.” – Lisa Simpson “Lisa, if you don’t like your job, you don’t strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That’s the American way!” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Otto, why don’t you get some more gas. Here’s the ‘credit card’.” – Principal Skinner “Ugh.” – Otto “And a mint for afterwards!” – Principal Skinner
Quote of the Day
“Simpson, I always thought you were sneaky and manipulative. But now I see you’re really a very sensitive little boy.” – Principal Skinner “Thank you, sir.” – Bart Simpson “Aww.” – Principal Skinner
Quote of the Day
“Five dollars a child? Last year it was free!” – Principal Skinner “Enh. New ownership.” – Fort Springfield Ticket Lady
Quote of the Day
“Ow! My bones are so brittle, but I always drink plenty of . . . Malk?” – Bart Simpson Happy 20th Anniversary to “The PTA Disbands”! Original airdate 16 April 1995.
Compare & Contrast: Pranking the New Teacher
“Kids have been doing that one since my day.” – Marge Simpson Rather than get into the nonsensical pageant of the transmundane that was the last third of “Blazed and Confused”, I’d like to take a look at a small moment from the beginning that illustrates the general shallowness of this episode. Specifically, the way that Bart’s closet/skeleton “prank” fails as both a prank, a joke, and as a part of the rest of the episode, especially when compared with Bart’s similar actions in “The PTA Disbands”. While the backstories differ considerably, the immediate situation in both episodes is remarkably similar. In…
Quote of the Day
“My teacher’s a nightmare! Three kids got sick from inhaling his ointment fumes, he confiscated everything made of tin, and then he sent us home early because he got his beard caught in the pencil sharpener.” – Lisa Simpson “Oh, okay, um, here . . . Oh!, uh, okay, let’s see, um, what if I did this? . . . You’re on your own!” – Abe “Grampa” Simpson
Reading Digest: Spreading Stupidity Edition
“Now for operation Strike Make Go Longer. . . . You know, I heard Skinner say the teachers will crack any minute.” – Bart Simpson “Skinner said the teachers will crack any minute, purple monkey dishwasher.” – Teacher “Well, we’ll show him! Especially for that purple monkey dishwasher remark.” – Mrs. Krabappel Sorry for the later than usual posting, but that Uproxx/Warming Glow thing was just too damn dumb to be dealt with in a snarky sentence or two. (That it came on a blog named after a Simpsons joke is just aggravazing.) As you’ll see, the stupid has already…
Quote of the Day
“Seymour, you are truly incompetent.” – Superintendent Chalmers “Well, I hardly think it’s fair-” – Principal Skinner “Dummy up, you! Listen to those passing motorists who support the teachers!” – Superintendent Chalmers
Quote of the Day
“But we don’t have that kind of money. In fact, no school could afford-” – Principal Skinner “Here’s the admission, plus something for you. See that they get a little extra education, would you?” – Principal Valiant “Yes, sir, Principal Valiant!” – Fort Springfield Ticket Taker “He thinks he’s so hot ever since he swept the Princy Awards. Well, those things are rigged.” – Principal Skinner
Reading Digest: Missing Canadian Edition
“It took the children forty minutes to locate Canada on the map.” – Marge Simpson “Marge, anyone can miss Canada, all tucked away down there.” – Homer Simpson Whenever Zombie Simpsons hitches its fading star to a currently popular celebrity, your Katys Perry and Ladys Gaga, the internet throws a brief but mild fit wherein huge numbers of pop culture sites that normally couldn’t give a fuck about the show write about how Celebrity X is gonna be Simpsonized. That very thing happened this week in regards to Justin Bieber’s brief and pointless cameo, so it’s a bit of a…
Quote of the Day
“You have to start putting money back into the school. You’ve cut back on everything, salaries, supplies, the food! I don’t care what you say, I can taste the newspaper.” – Mrs. Krabappel “Bosh, shredded newspapers add much needed roughage and essential inks. Besides, you didn’t notice the old gym mats.” – Principal Skinner “There’s very little meat in these gym mats.” – Lunchlady Doris
Quote of the Day
“Lisa, get in here. . . . In this house we obey the laws of thermodynamics!” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Talking out of turn, that’s a paddling. Looking out the window, that’s a paddling. Staring at my sandals, that’s a paddling. Paddling the school canoe? Oh, you better believe that’s a paddling.” – Jasper
Quote of the Day
“Hey, now that Largo’s gone we can play the forbidden music.” – Database Happy birthday Danny Elfman!
Quote of the Day
“We do have an emergency plan in case of a prolonged strike right here. Let’s see, replace teachers with super intelligent cyborgs. Or, if cyborgs aren’t invented yet, use people from the neighborhood.” – Ned Flanders
Quote of the Day
“The only books we have are ones that were banned by other schools.” – Mrs. Krabappel “Well, the kids have to learn about TekWar sooner or later.” – Principal Skinner
Reading Digest: Quadruple Agreement Edition
“Well, I guess this is a case where we’ll have to agree to disagree.” – Ned Flanders “I don’t agree to that.” – Principal Skinner “Neither do I.” – Mrs. Krabappel Most weeks I come across at least one person who, in talking about The Simpsons, will mention its precipitous decline in quality. This week I came across four – count ’em four! – such people. (One of them even used the term “Zombie Simpsons”.) So the end of this week’s Reading Digest is pure catnip, but there’s a bunch of other fun stuff as well. There’s a crazy fun…