“What’s so special about this game anyway? It’s just another chapter in the pointless rivalry between Springfield and Shelbyville. They built a mini-mall, so we built a bigger mini-mall. They made the world’s largest pizza, so we burned down their city hall.” – Lisa Simpson
Tag: Homer Loves Flanders
Quote of the Day
“He’s gaining on us!” – Rod Flanders “I’m scared!” – Todd Flanders “Come on, Ned, move this thing!” – Maude Flanders “I can’t, it’s a Geo!” – Ned Flanders Happy Terminator Day, everybody!
Quote of the Day
“I told you, officer. I’m not ‘hepped up’ on ‘goofballs’.” – Ned Flanders “Yeah, right.” – Chief Wiggum “Ned Flanders? I never would’ve imagined.” – Reverend Lovejoy “Ohh . . . oof!” – Ned Flanders “High as a kite, everybody! Goofballs!” – Chief Wiggum
Quote of the Day
“Bless the grocer for this wonderful meat, the middle man who jacked up the price, and let’s not forget the humane but determined boys over at the slaughterhouse.” – Ned Flanders
Quote of the Day
“God, if you really are God, you’ll get me tickets to that game!” – Homer Simpson “Hidily-ho, neighbor! Want to go to the game with me? I got two tickets!” – Ned Flanders “Why do you mock me, oh, Lord?” – Homer Simpson “Homer, that’s not God. That’s just a waffle that Bart tossed up there.” – Marge Simpson “I know I shouldn’t eat Thee, but . . . Mmmm, sacrilicious.” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Losers! Losers! Kiss my big Springfield behind, Shelbyville! . . . Ha ha! I am invincible! Invincible!” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Men, there’s a little crippled boy sitting in a hospital who wants you to win this game. I know, because I crippled him myself to inspire you.” – C.M. Burns “I hope they win, or Mr. Burns said he’s coming back.” – Milhouse van Houten
Quote of the Day
“Now, boys, Mr. Simpson is the guest. He gets to decide what to watch.” – Ned Flanders “Yeah! Hey, what gives, I thought you had a satellite dish?” – Homer Simpson “Sure diddly-do! Over two-hundred and thirty channels locked out!” – Ned Flanders
Quote of the Day
“Don’t you think you’re spending too much time with Ned? Your family needs you too.” – Marge Simpson “Oh, of course you’d say something like that, Marge, you’ve hated Ned for years! In fact, you wanted to bash his head in with a pipe.” – Homer Simpson “That was you!” – Marge Simpson “Love, Marge, don’t hate. Love.” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Homer, that’s our wedding photo.” – Marge Simpson “Marge, quit living in the past.” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“They swore they’d get us back by spiking our water supply, but they didn’t have the guts.” – Homer Simpson “Ohhh, the walls are melting again.” – Marge Simpson “Personally, I think I’m overdone.” – Turkey Happy birthday Wes Archer!
Quote of the Day
“Homer, I’d love to chitty-chat, but tonight’s the night I do my charity work.” – Ned Flanders “Oh, yeah, judge made me do that once, too. Stupid lack of public urinals.” – Homer Simpson Happy 20th Anniversary to “Homer Loves Flanders”! Original airdate 17 March 1994.
Quote of the Day
“Oh, can’t you see this man isn’t a hero? He’s annoying! He’s very, very annoying!” – Ned Flanders “Well, Ned Flanders is just jealous.” – Helen Lovejoy “The guy’s hepped up on goofballs.” – Moe “Let’s sacrifice him to our god! . . . Come on, we did it all the time in the 30s.” – Abe “Grampa” Simpson
Quote of the Day
“What’s wrong, Jeremiah?” – Old Sheep “It’s not fair. My brother Joseph has a sin to confess. I wish I had one too.” – Jeremiah the Sheep “Oh, don’t you see, you do have a sin to confess, the sin of envy.” – Old Sheep “That’s all well and good for sheep, but what are we to do?” – Todd Flanders
Quote of the Day
“Oh, you poor, unfortunate man. Let’s get you out of those clothes immediately, and we’ll do whatever we can about the smell.” – Father James Helter “But, I . . . alright.” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Watch this, Ned, they don’t call me Springfield Fats just because I’m morbidly obese.” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Tonight on Eye on Springfield, just miles from your doorstep, hundreds of men are given weapons and trained to kill. The government calls it “The Army”, but a more alarmist name would be: The Kill-Bot Factory.” – Kent Brockman
Quote of the Day
“Gimme, uh, thirty-thousand tickets.” – Scalper “That’ll be nine-hundred and fifty thousand dollars, please.” – Ticket Lady “Look, thing about that is, I only got ten dollars on me. Can I pay you the rest later?” – Scalper “Sure.” – Ticket Lady
Reading Digest: Flanders and Tebow Edition
“You know Stan Taylor?” – Homer Simpson “Know me? Ned Flanders saved me. I used to party all night and sleep with lingerie models until Ned and his Bible group showed me that I could have more.” – Stan “The Boy” Taylor “Professional athletes, always wanting more.” – Homer Simpson It’s silly season and so people tend to be away from their keyboards more than usual, which means a shorter than average Reading Digest. (In case you are bored or stuck at work or something, I have attempted to compensate through aggressive block quoting.) We do have two Tebow-Flanders links this week though, in addition to lots of crappy merchandise (seasonally appropriate!), the ugly reality behind that merchandise, some excellent usage, and a forward for the L.A. Kings who agrees with us. Enjoy. [Programming Note: With Annual Gift Man descending from the moon on Saturday night things are likely to be a little quiet around here. Quotes of the Day will go up as normal, of course, but there might be just one or two other posts next week, depending on when Netflix delivers the first disc of . . . ugh . . . Season 14. There probably will be a Reading Digest next week, but no promises. This time of year has a way of cruelly mocking well intentioned plans.] “Um…Dasher…Dancer…Prancer…Nixon…Comet…Cupid…Donna Dixon?” – Smooth Charlie’s Link of the Week is this piece of well deserved love for “Simpsons Roasting on an Open Fire”. That episode can never be loved enough. D’oh! Stunned couple unearth 800-year-old stone head in their garden… and it looks like HOMER SIMPSON – The 800 year figure is total speculation, but apparently someone at a museum did think it was old. And it does look like Homer. Review: Greetings from the Simpsons! – That postcard blog remains on a Simpsons roll. This week they’re reviewing two different books of Simpsons postcards. Check out Selma’s “Rocket Bra”. 7 Similarities Between Tim Tebow and Ned Flanders – I like #6 and #7: 6. Both are thankful for the little things, like rainbows. And Marion Barber. 7. Both have a non-believer they just cannot convert. Heh. Watch: Brad Bird talks about directing Tom Cruise in IMAX for M:I – Ghost Protocol – If we get one good thing out of a completely unnecessary fourth Mission Impossible movie, it will be to let Brad Bird do whatever he wants next: As long as I’ve been in LA, I’ve been enjoying great conversations with Brad Bird. When I worked at Dave’s Video in the early ’90s, Bird was one of our regular customers. At that point, he was working on "The Simpsons," and he was already known by some film geeks for his incredible "Family Dog" episode of "Amazing Stories." At that point, I remember long conversations about pulp classics, spy movies, his dream of making either "The Spirit" or a SF animated film called "Ray Gunn," and much more. He was one of those customers of ours who…
Quote of the Day
“I did it! Second in line and all I had to do was miss eight days of work.” – Homer Simpson “With the money you would’ve made working you could’ve bought tickets from a scalper.” – Guy “In theory, yes . . . jerk.” – Homer Simpson