“That was beautiful. What’s it called?” – Lisa Simpson “Oh, it’s a little tune that I call The I Never Had An Italian Soup Blues.” – Bleeding Gums Murphy Happy Birthday, Mike Reiss!
Tag: Mike Reiss
Makeup Quote of the Day
“Wasted away again in Margaritaville . . . ” – Shary Bobbins “Searching for my lost shaker of salt . . . Oh, here it is.” – Barney Gumble
Quote of the Day
“Now let’s take a look at a young Charles Bronson’s brief stint replacing Andy Griffith on The Andy Griffith Show.” – Before They Were Famous Host “Where’s Otis? He’s not in his cell.” – Not Don Knotts “I shot him.” – Charles Bronson “Well, that’s-what!?” – Not Don Knotts “Now I’m going down to Emmett’s Fix It Shop to fix Emmett.” – Charles Bronson Happy birthday, Mike Reiss!
Quote of the Day
“Sing us a song, Shary Bobbins.” – Bart Simpson “Yeah, sing us a song!” – Lisa Simpson “I’ve been singing you songs all day! I’m not a bloody jukebox!” – Shary Bobbins
Quote of the Day
“Look, my stomach really hurts.” – Bart Simpson “All I can give you are these chewable Prozac for kids. Your choice: Manic Depressive Mouse, or the Blue Bird of Unhappiness.” – Lunchlady Doris Happy birthday, Mike Reiss!
Quote of the Day
“Bart Simpson, meet Jay Sherman the critic.” – Homer Simpson “Hello.” – Jay Sherman “Hey, man, I really love your show. I think all kids should watch it! Ew, I suddenly feel so dirty.” – Bart Simpson Happy birthday Mike Reiss!
Quote of the Day
“Hurry, Moe, hurry! I’ve only got five minutes until the music store closes.” – Homer Simpson “Well, why don’t you go there first?” – Moe “Hey, do I tell you how to do your job?” – Homer Simpson “Sorry, Homer.” – Moe “You know, if you tip the glass there won’t be so much foam on top.” – Homer Simpson “Sorry, Homer.” – Moe Happy birthday Mike Reiss!
O’Brien, Jean, Reiss, Kogen and Martin
“Cartoons have writers?” – Bart Simpson “Enh, sort of.” – Lisa Simpson The 81 minute roundtable discussion Conan O’Brien hosted with Al Jean, Mike Reiss, Jay Kogen, and Jeff Martin is now live on O’Brien’s website. (I couldn’t get the embedding to work here on WordPress.) I must warn you: it is very addictive. I started it thinking I’d watch a few minutes and then come back to it tonight when I had more time. Nope. Watched it straight through my lunch. As a Simpsons fan, it’s a must-see. They talk about the origins of the show, joke about specific memories and episodes, and generally just crack each other up. It’s funny from start to finish, and at one point O’Brien puts this picture up: Clockwise from lower left: John Swartzwelder, David M. Stern, Mike Reiss, Conan O’Brien, Jeff Martin, Jon Vitti, Matt Groening, George Meyer, Al Jean (facing away from camera). Jean joked that this was a Potemkin village photo in that they brought in all the cutouts and cleaned the place up. There’s a lot of great stuff in here, but for now just let me note that at the 28:00 minute mark, Kogen says, “I remember when the show was at it’s, well, it’s still at it’s height.” Heh. Caught himself midsentence.
Bonus Quote of the Day
“I won’t lie to you, in this job, you will be shot at. Each of these bullet wounds is a badge of honor.” – Apu Nahasapeemapetilon “Badge of honor.” – Homer Simpson “Here’s a pointer, try to take it in the shoulder.” – Apu Nahasapeemapetilon Happy Birthday Mike Reiss!
Quote of the Day
Image used under Creative Commons license from Flickr user jaxed. “Now, this girlfriend of yours, is she a real looker?” – Abe Simpson “Un-huh.” – Homer Simpson “A lot on the ball?” – Abe Simpson “Oh yeah.” – Homer Simpson “Oh son, don’t over reach. Go for the dented car, the dead end job, the less attractive girl. Oh well, I blame myself. I should’ve had this talk a long time ago.” – Abe Simpson “Thanks, pop.” – Homer Simpson Happy birthday Mike Reiss!
Quote of the Day
“Fellow classmates, instead of voting for some athletic hero, or a pretty boy, you have elected me, your intellectual superior, as your king. Good for you.” – Artie Ziff “Very well said.” – Principal Dondelinger Happy birthday Mike Reiss!
Mike Reiss Compares Zombie Simpsons to Senile Old People
“So how long before you shipped Grandpa off to the old folks home?” – Bart Simpson “About three weeks.” – Homer Simpson Well, okay, he didn’t use the word “senile”, but he came awfully close: For those who say the show is no longer funny, Reiss has a simple answer: "Well, don’t watch it!" He likened the 450-episode show to a person. "The Simpsons change the way people change. Think of your grandparents. The either get boring or crazy and weird. I like to think ‘The Simpsons’ has gotten crazy and weird." First of all, most of the people who say it sucks don’t watch it. Until we started this here blog, I hadn’t seen a new one in years. But that doesn’t mean they don’t suck, nor does it mean I can’t say so as loudly and as often as possible. Secondly, I’m sure he meant “crazy and weird” in only the most positive way, but it’s not a good comparison. This is especially true when you consider that, when The Simpsons was still on the air, old people got it worse than any other group. Tacitly comparing the show to Grandpa Simpson is an admission of defeat, isn’t it? It means you’ve become everything you used to mock. Everybody tolerates Grandpa, but nobody goes out of their way to spend time with him. And secretly they’re all just waiting for the clock to run out. That’s a pretty good description of Zombie Simpsons, and it’s not the least bit flattering or positive. We just want it to end so we can remember the good times instead of the sickly shadow that shits itself once per week. I have no desire to pick on Reiss. He is vastly funnier than me, and moreover I love the guy. He was a big part of what made The Simpsons great, and he co-created The Critic. But if the best defense he has is comparing Zombie Simpsons to the doddering remains of a once vibrant person, well, that kinda says it all. (There’s other stuff in that article, some of it funny. But the Nasty Internet Critic Act of 2003 only allows me to discuss the parts I hate.)
Simpsons Alumni Update: Mike Reiss
Longtime Simpsons writer Mike Reiss has penned a limited edition children’s book for, of all things, Saks Fifth Avenue department store. It’s called “Twinkle Twinkle Little Flake” and it’s available exclusively at an over priced store near you: Twinkle Twinkle Little Flake tells the story of a snowflake named Twinkle who embarks on an adventure in New York City once she has fallen from her cloud. Readily available to purchase in-store, this exclusive limited edition book makes the perfect gift for children this holiday season. As part of their “Placate the Mob” program, Saks will give $2 of each $18 book purchase to charity.