“At seven tonight the game begins. Bart vs. Lisa, who will win? Their father’s fat and their mother’s thin and Grampa Simpson reeks of gin.” – Sherri & Terri “Hey! That’s Obsession for Men!” – Abe “Grampa” Simpson
Month: February 2014
Quote of the Day
“I’m sorry, Apu, I have no choice. You can no longer wear this name patch, and you can no longer tell people about our fried pickles. Now, turn in your pricing gun . . . the other one, too.” – Executive Happy 20th anniversary to “Homer and Apu”! Original airdate 10 February 1994.
Quote of the Day
“Alright, I have two announcements. Friday you will have the chance to ‘party down’ in the church basement with the Jesus rock stylings of Testament. That’s Friday, six pm sharp.” – Revered Lovejoy “Pfft, all the best bands are affiliated with Satan.” – Bart Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Well, well, look who’s here, Mr. No Bribe. Sure, we’ll help you. Just sit down and wait for Detective Like I Give A Damn.” – Chief Wiggum “Thank you, so much.” – Homer Simpson “Dad.” – Lisa Simpson “Honey, Daddy’s waiting for the detective.” – Homer Simpson
Reading Digest: Hooray Season 2 Edition
“Look, there’s only one thing worse than being a loser. It’s being one of those guys who sits in a bar telling the story of how he became a loser, and I never want that to happen to me.” – Homer Simpson “Please, Homer.” – Barney Gumble “Yeah, come on, Homer.” – Moe “Well, okay.” – Homer Simpson We’ve got three links about Season 2 this week, and not just “here’s a thing that happened in this episode”, but lots of love for the whole season. Excellent. In addition to that, Hank Azaria got a new part, there’s some cool…
Quote of the Day
“Okay, just breathe through your mouth and don’t ask how they’re feeling.” – Bart Simpson
Quote of the Day
“And the ugly duckling was amazed to realize it had grown into a beautiful swan. So you see children, there is hope for anyone.” – Kindergarten Teacher “Even me?” – Bart Simpson “No.” – Kindergarten Teacher
Quote of the Day
“I could crush him like an ant, but it would be too easy. No, revenge is a dish best served cold. I’ll bide my time until . . . oh, what the hell, I’ll just crush him like an ant.” – C.M. Burns
Quote of the Day
“Stop everything! I don’t remember writing a check for bowling.” – C.M. Burns “Uh, sir, that’s a check for your boweling.” – Mr. Smithers “Oh, yes, that’s very important.” – C.M. Burns “Yes, sir. Remember that month you didn’t do it.” – Mr. Smithers “Yes, that was unpleasant for all concerned.” – C.M. Burns
Quote of the Day
“Oh, man, it’s a miracle we got through that one. Remind me never to let you on stage again, kid. Some people got it, and some people don’t. And you, my young friend, do not have, hold on, I want to finish this thought outside.” – Krusty the Klown “It’s that kid!” – Crowd Member #1 “It’s the ‘I Didn’t Do It’ guy!” – Crowd Member #2 “He’s mine! I own him and all the subsidiary rights!” – Krusty the Klown Happy 20th Anniversary to “Bart Gets Famous”! Original airdate 3 February 1994.
Quote of the Day
“The road to the Super Bowl is long and pointless . . . I mean, when you think about it.” – TV Announcer
Quote of the Day
“Homer, of all the crazy ideas you’ve had, this one ranks somewhere in the middle. You’re thirty-eight years old, you don’t know how to box, and you haven’t gotten any exercise since grade school. Before you even consider this, I insist you consult a doctor.” – Marge Simpson “No problemo.” – Homer Simpson “A competent doctor!” – Marge Simpson “D’oh!” – Homer Simpson