“Marge, what does it do?” – Homer Simpson “It doesn’t do anything.” – Marge Simpson “Marge, really, what does it do?” – Homer Simpson “Whatever it does, it’s doing it now.” – Marge Simpson This week we’ve got two links to serious artists making Simpsons heads. One is Bart made from old toys and is appropriately creepy, and the other is a series of awesome Krusty drawings that I’m not even going to try to describe. In addition to that, we’ve got an excellent Ralph t-shirt, Olympic and international cricket usage, a completed Lisa cross stitch, a great first family…
Month: February 2014
Quote of the Day
“Yay! We’re getting a new TV!” – Homer, Bart and Lisa Simpson “Let’s go to the Sharper Image! They’ve got a TV shaped like a 50s diner.” – Bart Simpson “No, let’s go to The Nature Company, they’ve got a TV assembled by Hopi Indians.” – Lisa Simpson “We can’t afford to shop at any store that has a philosophy. We just need a TV.” – Marge Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Now, kids, while your mother’s gone, I don’t want to have to wash any dishes. So, from now on, drink straight from the faucet or milk carton, and we’ll eat while standing over the sink or toilet.” – Homer Simpson Happy birthday Bill Oakley!
Quote of the Day
“Thank God it’s Wednesday.” – Jasper “It’s Friday.” – Mrs. Glick “Uh-oh, wrong pills. . . . Uh, little help?” – Jasper
Quote of the Day
“Sorry, we’re not allowed to read newspapers. They angry up the blood!” – Abe “Grampa” Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Uh, question for the barbecue chef: don’t you think there is an inherent danger in sending underqualified civilians into space?” – Reporter “I’ll field this one. The only danger is if they send us to that terrible planet of the apes . . . wait a minute, Statue of Liberty, that was our planet! You maniacs! You blew it up! Damn you! Damn you all to hell!” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“And then, the handsome prince realized he had to go to the bathroom, really bad. But the evil ogre, Barney, had left the men’s room in the most wicked condition! So, the prince went out back to the enchanted alley.” – Homer Simpson “That’s not a fairy tale, it’s just something that happened to you at Moe’s.” – Lisa Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Save our seats!” – Bart Simpson “Will do!” – Homer Simpson “Hello.” – Strange Man “Oh.” – Homer Simpson
Reading Digest: Excited Edition
“This is so exciting. Last time I got to go backstage was when Bart ripped his pants at the Christmas play.” – Marge Simpson “Mom!” – Bart Simpson “Ha ha.” – Eric “Bobo” Correa The torrent of new Simpsons merchandise continues this week, and what I’ve noticed isn’t so much the amazing breadth of the products (clothing, ice cube trays, figurines) as the way that every single company describes themselves as “excited” to be selling crappy Simpsons stuff. They all do it, and the consistency is terrifying. On the subject of merchandise, they announced the date of the long ago…
Quote of the Day
“Oh, okay, calm down, just think: What would Curtis E. Bear do?” – Marge Simpson “Move it! I gotta return this suit!” – Curtis E. Bear (Eddie)
Quote of the Day
“I have nothing to offer you but my love.” – Milhouse van Houten “I specifically said no geeks!” – C.M. Burns “But my mom says I’m cool.” – Milhouse van Houten
Quote of the Day
“Seymour, you are truly incompetent.” – Superintendent Chalmers “Well, I hardly think it’s fair-” – Principal Skinner “Dummy up, you! Listen to those passing motorists who support the teachers!” – Superintendent Chalmers
Quote of the Day
“That’s right, it was I.” – Lisa Simpson “Lis, why did you do it?” – Bart Simpson “Come on, Bart, in your pre-fascist days you knew the giddy thrill of futile rebellion.” – Lisa Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Trust in yourself and you can achieve anything.” – Lisa Lionheart “You know, if we get through to just that one little girl, it’ll all be worth it.” – Lisa Simpson “Yes, particularly if that little girl happens to pay forty-six thousand dollars for that doll.” – Stacy Lovell “What?” – Lisa Simpson “Oh nothing. Kudos to you, Lisa. Kudos.” – Stacy Lovell Happy 20th Anniversary to “Lisa vs. Malibu Stacy”! Original airdate 17 February 1994.
Quote of the Day
“We need some excitement around here.” – C.M. Burns “Chinese checkers or domestic, sir?” – Mr. Smithers
Quote of the Day
“Get out here, son! There’s a doings a transpiring!” – Shelbyville Homer Happy birthday Matt Groening!
Reading Digest: Happy Bacon Day Edition
“And this is for my huggy bug in honor of this special day.” – Marge Simpson “Special day? Oh, what have I forgotten now? Now, don’t panic. Is it Bacon Day? No! That’s crazy talk. She’s getting impatient, take a stab at it . . .” – Homer’s Brain “Happy . . . Valentine’s Day.” – Homer Simpson “Oh, thank you, dear.” – Marge Simpson “Woo-hoo!” – Homer Simpson Today, as we all know (even Reddit), is Bacon Day. Like most holidays on the American calendar, whatever was once good and fun about Bacon Day was acquired in a hostile…
Quote of the Day
“Doing the Monster Mash with you on this beautiful Valentine’s Day.” – Marty “Marty, why did you play that song today? There must be thousands of love songs.” – Bill “Well, it’s kind of a love song, all the monsters, enjoying each other’s company, dancing, holding their evil in check.” – Marty “You played the wrong record, didn’t you?” – Bill “Why are you doing this to me?” – Marty
Quote of the Day
“Come back here, I’m not through demeaning you!” – Freddy Quimby
Quote of the Day
“Ahoy ahoy? . . . No, you have the wrong number. This is 5246. I suspect you need more practice working your telephone machine.” – C.M. Burns