“Look, there’s only one reasonable way to settle this: rock, paper, scissors.” – Lisa Simpson “Poor, predictable Bart. Always takes rock.” – Lisa’s Brain “Good old rock, nothing beats that!” – Bart’s Brain “Rock!” – Bart Simpson “Paper.” – Lisa Simpson “D’oh!” – Homer Simpson
Category: The Simpsons
Quote of the Day
“Mr. Simpson, I presume.” – Not Henry Morton Stanley Happy birthday, George Meyer!
Quote of the Day
“I read about what happens to kids whose parents no longer love and cherish each other. They go through eight separate stages. Right now, I’m in stage three: fear. You’re in stage two: denial.” – Lisa Simpson “No, I’m not.” – Bart Simpson “Yes, you are.” – Lisa Simpson “No, I’m not!” – Bart Simpson “Yes, you are!” – Lisa Simpson “Am not! Am not! Am not!” – Bart Simpson Happy birthday David Silverman!
Quote of the Day
“Young man, you need to do some serious boning!” – Principal Skinner Happy 20th Anniversary to “Das Bus”! Original airdate 15 Feb 1998. (Oh, and happy birthday to some guy name Groening.)
Quote of the Day
“Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-Leader! Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-Leader!” – Movementarian “Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-Leader! Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-Leader! Leader! Leader!” – Suckers “Batman!” – Homer Simpson Happy 20th Anniversary to “The Joy of Sect”! Original airdate: 8 February 1998
Quote of the Day
“Hey, kids, while Sideshow Mel mops up, let’s see the names of our Krusty Birthday Pals for today!” – Krusty the Klown “Alright, here comes my name! . . . Wow! Best eight bucks I ever spent.” – Bart Simpson Happy birthday, Al Jean!
The Cost of Zombie Simpsons
“I think it’s full, sir.” – Mr. Smithers “That’s ridiculous! The last tree held nine drums!” – C.M. Burns NOTE: Back in September, in response to Alf Clausen’s firing, I posted what would be a new chapter for an expanded version of “Zombie Simpsons: How the Best Show Ever Became the Broadcasting Undead”. The book is still being shopped to publishers, and early responses have been mixed, in that some of them ignore it, and others reject it. But it’s Simpsons Day, and I’m a long way from giving up on it, so here is another new chapter. It’s very…
Sunday Preview: Grampy Can You Hear Me
Grampa gets a hearing aid and finally hears what everyone has been saying about him; Mr. Skinner discovers that his mother has kept a secret from him. It’s been a while since I watched this show, but I am not sure what ‘everyone has been saying about him’. I am pretty sure one of the biggest things this show does is to illustrate the insane level of neglect the Simpson family bestows upon Grampa. I can’t find who the guest star is this week, if there even is one, but I only spent about 8 seconds looking. Enjoy.
Quote of the Day
“What are you looking at, Bart? Are those naughty dogs back again?” – Mrs. Krabappel Marcia Wallace would’ve been 75 today. Happy birthday!
Bonus Quote of the Day
“What I’d like to say is: we’re still looking for the real killers. Anyway, in conclusion, a man cannot be forced to testify against his wife.” – Homer Simpson “Stop winking!” – Marge Simpson Happy Birthday Dan Castellaneta!
Quote of the Day
“Your son Bart sounds very bad.” – Pepe “Oh, he is. . . . Son, I just want you to know I love you very much.” – Homer Simpson “Shut up!” – Bart Simpson Happy birthday Nancy Cartwright!
Quote of the Day
“Now I’d like to introduce you to Lunchlady Doris who will serve you healthy, nutritious meals.” – Principal Skinner “Yeah, right.” – Lunchlady Doris Doris Grau would’ve been 93 today. Happy birthday.
Behind Us Forever: Springfield Splendor
“She doesn’t look sad. I don’t see any tears in her eyes.” – Homer Simpson “It’s not that kind of sad. I’m sorry, Dad, but you wouldn’t understand.” – Lisa After last week’s little experiment, it’s back to regular Zombie Simpsons this week, including plots that don’t make sense, two clock eating montages, several unnecessarily self-voiced celebrities, the standard hacktacular ending, and plenty of characters telling us exactly how they’re feeling. As a sort of bonus, some of this week’s exposition is written down rather than spoken. The story here is – and stop me if you’ve seen this one…
Saturday Morning Cartoons
“Young lady, cow hearts belong in a butcher’s window, not the classroom. Well, maybe in an older student’s biology classroom. But that’s none of my business. Elementary school is where I wound up and it’s too late to do anything about that!” – Principal Skinner The above is yet another example of how The Simpsons was able to cram jokes into every conceivable place in its episodes. It comes right as Lisa has set up Allison for failure at Diorama-Rama. For the middle of it, the sound even fades out on Skinner as the camera pushes in on Lisa, revealing her…
Behind Us Forever: The Serfsons
“I’ll go to the first aid tent and tell them to plug in ye olde stomach pump.” – Lisa Simpson NOTE: Sorry this took all week to post. I was traveling. I should start out by saying that I appreciate that they at least tried to get creative here. “The Serfsons” is basically an episode length Halloween segment that gets the tiresome antics of Zombie Simpsons out of Springfield without the family having to win another contest or something. The good news is that you can tell they actually put some effort into this one; there are a couple of…
Quote of the Day
“Look! He’s headed back to the greyhound racing track where we found him.” – Bart Simpson “Don’t worry. As soon as they find out he doesn’t have any money, they’ll throw him out. Believe me, I know.” – Homer Simpson Happy birthday, Mike Scully!
Bonus Quote of the Day
“Hello, I’m Troy McClure. You may remember me from such movies as ‘Cry Yuma!’ and ‘Here Comes the Coast Guard!’ But today I’d like to talk to you about a pleasant tasting candy that actually cleans and straightens your teeth.” – Troy McClure Phil Hartman would’ve been sixty-nine today. (Nice.) Happy birthday.
Quote of the Day
“At last the world is safe, eh, Fallout Boy?” – Lunchlady Doris “What’s for lunch tomorrow?” – Ralph Wiggum “Next.” – Big Shot Hollywood Director Happy birthday, Brad Bird!
Saturday Morning Cartoons
“Mr. Speaker, if I could call your attention to the retroactive subsidy appropriations override bill, I refer you to page four thousand five hundred and…” – Cable I’ve often said that it’s the little things that are what makes The Simpsons endlessly rewatchable. Case in point is the houseplant above, which I did not notice for years and years. The first time we see it is when Marge carries it into the house right before Homer announces to his family that they’ve now got cable. From there it gets set next to the couch as an unobtrusive background gag that also demonstrates…
Quote of the Day
“Forty-eight, forty-nine, fifty. Flag’s up to date, very good, Seymour.” – Superintendent Chalmers Happy birthday David Mirkin!