“That doll is evil, I tells ya. Evil! Evil!” – Abe “Grampa” Simpson “Grampa, you said that about all the presents.” – Marge Simpson “I just want attention.” – Abe “Grampa” Simpson I happened to find myself at my brother’s house yesterday, keeping an eye on three of his kids, two nephews (13 and 11) and a niece (8). Though they’re well aware that the new episodes are subpar, they wanted to watch the new Zombie Simpsons. When Homer farted for the first time my niece got a goofy grin on her face, but the boys only looked up from…
Month: October 2011
Quote of the Day
“Before last year’s Halloween show, I warned you not to let your children watch, but you did anyway. Well, this year’s episode is even worse. It’s scarier and more violent, and I think they snuck in some bad language too.” – Marge Simpson Happy 20th anniversary to “Treehouse of Horror II”! Original airdate 31 October 1991.
Sunday Preview: Treehouse of Horror XXII
Image from here, photoshop by Dave. Well, that was a nice two weeks, but Zombie Simpsons returns tonight with another indifferent and slow witted entry in the once proud Treehouse of Horror series. Simpsons Channel has the lackluster details: Homer takes a dangerous dive into an isolated canyon on Candy Peak, but when a crashing boulder traps his arm, he channels Aron Ralston (guest voicing as himself) to save himself. In “The Diving Bell and Butterball,” the first of three hair-raising Halloween tales, a venomous spider bite leaves Homer paralyzed, but when Lisa discovers Homer’s ability to communicate through natural…
Quote of the Day
“Hey, who’s this ‘Homer’ dude?” – Captain Otto “He’s either a fifty foot prehistoric ape, or a tourist trap concocted by the Ape Island Jaycees. Either way, we’re going ashore.” – C.M. Burns
Quote of the Day
“Come family, sit in the snow with Daddy and let us all bask in television’s warm, glowing warming glow.” – Homer Simpson Happy birthday Dan Castellaneta!
Reading Digest: Marge Costume Edition
As I’m sure everyone knows, Monday is Halloween, and while there were lots and lots of previews for Sunday’s Zombie Simpsons episode, you will find none of them linked below. Why bore yourself more than once? Instead we have several links to Marge costumes past and present. Sadly, the only picture is of a lame store bought one, but a quick Google Image search will net you plenty of great looking homemade ideas and tips. In addition to that, we’ve got a Homer video game customization, a wildly overzealous copyright takedown notice, lots of usage, a kick ass home made…
Quote of the Day
“In case all that smiling didn’t cheer you up, there’s one thing that never fails: a nice glass of warm milk, a little nap, and a total frontal lobotomy.” – Ned Flanders
Quote of the Day
“Alright, stay calm, remember your training. ‘Dear Homer I.O.U. one emergency donut signed Homer’. Bastard! He’s always one step ahead!” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“And to conclude this Halloween newscast on a scary note, remember, the presidential primaries are only a few months away.” – Kent Brockman “Hey, if you don’t like it, go to Russia.” – Homer Simpson
“Eternal Moonshine of the Simpson Mind” Is Boring
“Wow, you look really hung over, Dad. What did you do last night?” – Lisa Simpson “Last night? Um . . .” – Homer Simpson Last week I came across a blog post titled “How to End the Simpsons – Eternal Moonshine of the Simpson Mind (s19e09)”. The author loves The Simpsons, says that he “has some significant misgivings about the current state of the show”, and tries to imagine how they might go about finally ending the thing. While he’s not too keen on Zombie Simpsons, he is optimistic that they could end the show decently, and, as you…
Quote of the Day
“Bart, what happened?” – Marge Simpson “Well, we hit a little snag when the universe sort of collapsed on itself. But Dad seemed cautiously optimistic.” – Bart Simpson “Crap!” – Homer Simpson Happy birthday Nancy Cartwright!
Quote of the Day
“Didn’t Itchy Junior look happy playing with his father? And didn’t Scratchy Junior look happy playing with his dad until they got run over by a thresher?” – Krusty the Klown Happy 20th anniversary to “Like Father Like Clown”! Original airdate 24 October 1991.
Quote of the Day
“What have we become?” – Jasper “We’ve given the word ‘mob’ a bad name.” – Dr. Hibbert
Write About Lisa Simpson for Someone Besides Us
“Look Dad, I made a modest studio apartment for my Malibu Stacy doll. This is the kitchen, this is where she prints her weekly feminist newsletter . . . Dad! You’re not listening to me!” – Lisa Simpson Few things drain the joy out of entertainment more than social or political patronization. Even if you agree with a particular cause or sentiment, it isn’t fun to have righteousness clumsily thumped into your skull, especially by rich, do-gooder celebrities. Stevie Wonder and Paul McCartney are two musicians of indescribable talent, but “Ebony & Ivory” is agitprop of such brazen low quality…
Quote of the Day
“The deep fryer’s here. I got it used from the Navy. You could flash fry a buffalo in forty seconds.” – Moe “Forty seconds? But I want it now!” – Homer Simpson
Reading Digest: Comic Book Edition
“Who’re you supposed to be?” – Comic Convention Guy “I’m Bartman!” – Bart Simpson “Never heard of him, full price.” – Comic Convention Guy We’ve got several comic book links this week, but the first one is over the moon outstanding. On top of that there’s another piece of banana art, another Harry Shearer interview, lots of lists, a Julie Kavner update, and what may be the most awesome Kang (or is it Kodos?) t-shirt ever made. Enjoy. The Line It Is Drawn #62 – Comic Book Characters/Simpsons Characters – Smooth Charlie’s Click of the Week is almost too awesome…
Quote of the Day
“Poison? Oh, what should I do? What should I do? Tell me quick!” – Homer Simpson “No need to panic. There’s a map to the hospital on the back of the menu.” – Sushi Chef
“Significant” & “Lasting”: Two Words That Don’t Apply to Zombie Simpsons
“How about it, Luann, will you marry me, again?” – Kirk van Houten “Ooh, no.” – Luann van Houten “Uh, well, uh, can I have my shirts back at least?” – Kirk van Houten “Okay, you heard the lady, why don’t you take it outside, alright?” – Pyro “I’ll be back, prob-probably.” – Kirk van Houten To reinforce my point from last week that there’s really no way to change the show enough to make it interesting again without also destroying whatever is left of its appeal, I’d like to point out the Zombie Simpsons enforced absurdities of this list…
Quote of the Day
“Mr. Simpson, the state bar forbids me from promising you a big cash settlement. But just between you and me, I promise you a big cash settlement.” – Lionel Hutz
Quote of the Day
“Hey, Bart, how’s your arm?” – Lisa Simpson “It’s alright. I was hoping they’d give me one of those steel claws, but what are you gonna do?” – Bart Simpson