“Somebody’s traveling light.” – Homer Simpson “Meh. Maybe you’re getting stronger.” – Lisa Simpson “Well, I have been eating more.” – Homer Simpson
Year: 2010
Sunday Preview: “How Munched Is That Birdie In The Window?”
I hate shitty, two-bit, fame-whore Danica Patrick so much that I’m not even going to dignify this episode with commentary. I’ll leave it at the description from our friends at Simpsons Channel: Bart helps nurse an injured pigeon back to health. After Santa’s Little Helper eats the bird, Bart has a hard time coping with the loss. Worried that Bart needs some help getting over the loss, Marge and Homer take him to a therapy session with Dr. Thurston, who advises that the only cure for Bart’s blues is to give away the family dog, but when the Simpsons visit…
Quote of the Day
“I can’t go on. You two go ahead. And carry me with you.” – Milhouse van Houten Happy birthday Pamela Hayden!
Quote of the Day
“This is Kent Brockman reporting live from Arnie Pie’s traffic copter. But, I can assure you, this is no mere morning traffic report.” – Kent Brockman “Hey!” – Arnie Pie “Face the facts, Arnie.” – Kent Brockman
Reading Digest: And a Spring For Its Curly Tail Edition
“This is terrible at best. I’m surprised at you, Lisa.” – Miss Hoover “Me too.” – Lisa Simpson This week’s reading digest is very short for obvious, holiday related reasons. That in no way lessens the quality of the links below however. There’s some cool fan art, plenty of YouTube, and the funniest car crash in Texas. Enjoy. Babies On Board – How’s this for a holiday bargain? You don’t even have to click through to Smooth Charlie’s Click of the Week. You can just push play: Fantastic. …
Quote of the Day
“Coming up this hour on the Impulse Buying Network, your chance to own a piece of Itchy & Scratchy, the toon-town-twosome beloved by everyone, even cynical members of Generation X.” – Troy McClure “Yeah. ‘Groovy’.” – Cynical Member of Generation X Happy birthday Wes Archer!
Crazy Noises: The Fool Monty
In our ongoing mission to bring you only the shallowest and laziest analysis of Zombie Simpsons, we’re keeping up our Crazy Noises series for Season 22. Since a podcast is so 2004, and video would require a flag, a fern and some folding chairs from the garage, we’ve elected to use the technology that brought the word “emoticon” to the masses: the chatroom. Star Trek image macros are strictly forbidden, unless you have a really good reason why Captain Picard is better than Captain Kirk. This text has been edited for clarity and spelling (especially on “dickey”). I’ve linked the…
Quote of the Day
“Ohh, what a hit!” – Gil #1 “Oh yeah, he’s out cold, Gil.” – Gil #2 “Oh, yes sir, looks like they’ll be feeding him Thanksgiving dinner through a tube.” – Gil #1 “Hope they can fit a turkey in there.” – Gil #2 “Get on with it, Gil.” – Gil #1
Thanksgiving Programming Update
“Thank you for watching Movie for a Dreary Afternoon.” – TV Announcer Everything is a bit of a duketastrophe here in the States on account of Thanksgiving. But there will be a Crazy Noises tomorrow and there will quite likely be some kind of Reading Digest on Friday. Please stay tuned for paid political announcements brought to you by the Friends of Kang & Kodos: No, I don’t know why YouTube is in stretched widescreen now. Yes, here’s another one:
Quote of the Day
“You certainly broke up that meeting.” – McBain Girl “Right now I’m thinking about holding another meeting . . . in bed.” – McBain “Oh, McBain!” – McBain Girl
Compare & Contrast: Burns Hosts a Party
“This party is over.” – C.M. Burns Over the years, Zombie Simpsons has gutted a lot of the great characters bequeathed to it by The Simpsons. Moe went from being a bitter bartender running various criminal side businesses to a perpetually lovesick wet blanket. Chief Wiggum used to be a gleefully corrupt and incompetent police chief, now he’s their go-to guy when they want a fat and/or stupid joke and Homer’s already in use. I’m not even sure Patty and Selma are on the show anymore. The less said about what happened to Lenny and Carl the better. Burns hasn’t…
Quote of the Day
“It’s eleven o’clock, do you know where your children are?” – Public Service Announcement “I told you last night: no!” – Homer Simpson
All Downhill
“Gimme your fortune or I’ll pound your withered old face in!” – Nelson Muntz “Oh, I like his energy. Put him on the callback list.” – C.M. Burns Once the overwrought couch gag finally ended, and I think it may have been longer than Avatar itself, Zombie Simpsons had a secret media conspiracy inside the Statue of Liberty. To my astonishment, it was actually funny. To no astonishment whatsoever, the rest of the episode was not. Even by the filler-rific standards of Zombie Simpsons, the last, oh, seventeen minutes or so of this episode were filler-rific. Burns’ odd suicide alone…
Quote of the Day
“And lord, we’re especially thankful for nuclear power, the cleanest, safest energy source there is . . . except for solar, which is just a pipe dream.” – Homer Simpson Happy 20th anniversary to “Bart vs. Thanksgiving”! Original airdate: 22 November 1990.
Sunday Preview: “The Fool Monty”
Sweet baby Jesus, Zombie Simpsons are at it again this week with another spiritual rehash of an old episode. Tonight, Lisa takes an interest in curmudgeonly old Burns, only to realize that he’s incapable of being changed. Sounds familiar, right? It’s basically the plot of Season 8’s “The Old Man and the Lisa,” and I harbor doubts that “The Fool Monty” can outshine its predecessor. If you’re still curious, here’s the actual rundown from Simpsons Channel: After learning that he is suffering from multiple illnesses and has only a few weeks to live, Mr. Burns becomes distraught by the…
Quote of the Day
“You, wandering mongrel, get out of my mom and pop operation!” – Apu Nahasapeemapetilon
Saturday Morning Cartoons
File this under shit I’m still impressed the show got away with in 1991: That is, uh, not subtle.
Quote of the Day
Image used under Creative Commons license from Flickr user Franco Folini. “You know, the whale is not really a fish. They’re mammals like you and me.” – Tom “Is that true?” – Pepe “Pfft. No.” – Homer Simpson
Reading Digest: Real World Usage Edition
“You will now go back to your hometowns, and do kids parties, swap meets, and all the other piddling crap I wouldn’t touch with a ten foot clown pole.” – Krusty the Klown This week we’ve got quite a few links to real world applications of Simpsons stuff. It’s all here, from comparisons to SpongeBob, good homes for those promotional statues from the movie, building-sized murals, anti-mold remodeling, and what may be the greatest toilet paper dispenser in the long and glorious history of toilet paper dispensers. There’s also an awesome Ned Flanders costume, a list of great B-plots, and…
Quote of the Day
“I have had it! I have had it with this school, Skinner! The low test scores, class after class of ugly, ugly children.” – Superintendent Chalmers