“Well, William, another school year gone by.” – Principal Skinner “And may I say, a job well done, sir.” – Groundskeeper Willie “Well, back to work then. Make sure to give those toilets a good scrubbing. We want the old girls sparkling when I get back.” – Principal Skinner “Aye, sir . . . ya silk wearing buttercup.” – Groundskeeper Willie
Year: 2011
Reading Digest: Roasting on an Open Fire Edition
“Bart, did you hear that? What a name! Santa’s Little Helper? It’s a sign! It’s an omen!” – Homer Simpson “It’s a coincidence, Dad.” – Bart Simpson I know tomorrow is New Year’s Eve and that Christmas is in the rearview mirror, but this is a list of links from the past week, and in that time “Simpsons Roasting on an Open Fire” won the internet. We’ve got five – count ’em five! – links to people who in one way or another wrote up the original Simpsons episode. Combined with comments like these, it’s nice to see it still…
Quote of the Day
“There are two ways for a dog to relieve himself. One is like a faithful friend and partner for life. The other is like a hose without a fireman. Which way do you think that was, Mr. Simpson?” – Emily Winthrop “Like a hose . . . your wrinkled highness.” – Bart Simpson Happy birthday Tracey Ullman!
Quote of the Day
“And that’s why I will continue to oppose teen alcoholism in all its forms. . . . Now, are there any questions? Keeping in mind that I already explained about my hair.” – Bush the Elder
Quote of the Day
“Wow, Bart, Mr. Burns gives you everything you could ever want. My parents use that old love excuse to screw me out of toys.” – Milhouse van Houten
Quote of the Day
“Now let’s hear it for a great American, former President Gerald Ford.” – Krusty the Klown “Thank you, Krusty, for inviting me.” – Gerald Ford “Well, all the good Presidents turned us down.” – Krusty the Klown
Quote of the Day
“Did you get the job?” – Marge Simpson “Nah. They wanted someone good.” – Homer Simpson Happy 20th Anniversary to “I Married Marge”! Original airdate 26 December 1991.
Quote of the Day
“I hope you feel better, Santa.” – Little Girl “Oh, I will when Mrs. Claus’s sisters get out of town. Thanks for listening kid.” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Tonight we’ll visit Springfield’s answer to the Benedictine monks, the Rappin’ Rabbis.” – Kent Brockman “Don’t eat pork, not even with a fork! Can’t touch this!” – The Rappin’ Rabbis “Marge, are we Jewish?” – Homer Simpson “No, Homer.” – Marge Simpson “Woo-hoo!” – Homer Simpson
Reading Digest: Flanders and Tebow Edition
“You know Stan Taylor?” – Homer Simpson “Know me? Ned Flanders saved me. I used to party all night and sleep with lingerie models until Ned and his Bible group showed me that I could have more.” – Stan “The Boy” Taylor “Professional athletes, always wanting more.” – Homer Simpson It’s silly season and so people tend to be away from their keyboards more than usual, which means a shorter than average Reading Digest. (In case you are bored or stuck at work or something, I have attempted to compensate through aggressive block quoting.) We do have two Tebow-Flanders links…
Quote of the Day
“I’ve never seen such an obvious attempt to curry my favor.” – C.M. Burns “Fabulous observation, sir. Just fabulous.” – Mr. Smithers Happy birthday Harry Shearer!
Compare & Contrast: Bart’s Remorse
“Oh, yikes, what is that?” – Bart Simpson “It’s the centerpiece, Bart.” – Lisa Simpson “Well, it’s taking up valuable real estate.” – Bart Simpson As our friend Mike Amato has been plowing through all the old episodes, I’ve been wondering what he was going to say about “Marge Be Not Proud”. This week, I got to find out. He’s a lot more upbeat about the episode than I am, but what surprised me in reading his take was how little we actually disagreed. There really are a lot of good and excellent parts in this episode, and his long…
Quote of the Day
“Your son is a very sick boy, just look at the X-rays. You see that dark spot there? Whiplash.” – Dr. Nick Riviera “Whiplash? Oh, no!” – Homer Simpson “And this smudge here that looks like my fingerprint? No, that’s trauma.” – Dr. Nick Riviera
Quote of the Day
“I’m here live in Korea to give you a first hand look at how American cartoons are made.” – Kent Brockman Happy birthday Phil Roman!
Season 7 Sunsets: Has Anyone Else Noticed This?
“Well, get a last look at the beautiful ocean scenery, kids.” – Homer Simpson A few weeks ago I noticed something peculiar about Season 7: half the episodes end with a sunset or something similar, often with someone heading off into it. As near as I can tell, it’s not like that in any other season. Even Season 8, which was run and written by most of the same people as Season 7, features a more typically random assortment of endings. These are the endings of the Season 7 episodes that were done under Oakley and Weinstein: Radioactive Man –…
Quote of the Day
“So, kids, what do you want to play?” – Ned Flanders “Good Samaritan!” – Rod & Todd Flanders “I get to clothe the leper!” – Rod Flanders “Lucky.” – Todd Flanders
Dead Homer Society Xmas Gift Guide
“Oyster shells! Hand painted to resemble Lucille Ball! You’ll love Oyster Lucy!” – Moe For the second year in a row we here at the Dead Homer Society are offering this belated and woefully incomplete shopping guide for the Simpsons fan in your life. Just like last year, the idea here is to find cool Simpsons stuff that does not feed the merchandising beast that does more than anything else to keep Zombie Simpsons on the air. Also just like last year, this basically amounts to me doing a search on Etsy and then linking the best results. Still, any…
Quote of the Day
“Number one, I’ve lost the will to live.” – Moe “Oh, that’s ridiculous, Moe. You’ve got lots to live for.” – Marge Simpson “Really? That’s not what Reverend Lovejoy’s been telling me. Wow, you’re good. Thanks.” – Moe
Quote of the Day
“I’d give anything to go to that show.” – Bart Simpson “I’d sell my first born son.” – Homer Simpson “Hey!” – Bart Simpson “You’ll do as you’re told.” – Homer Simpson
Season 1 Marathon: 13 Episodes, 13 Beers, 4h:59m:07s
“Beer. Now there’s a temporary solution.” – Homer Simpson Good morning and welcome to a special, unannounced, Simpsons Day Beer-Simpsons marathon! For the last two years I’ve been stuck at work on Simpsons Day. That resulted in a lot of YouTube and regular posts. Of those, the 1989 Groening interview on Letterman is probably my favorite. He’s wretchedly adorable in his nervous, pre-fame earnestness. (The embedding’s been disabled in the two years since I posted it, but you can click through to YouTube to see it.) For Simpsons Day this year my butt is planted right where it belongs: squarely…