“I have learned that most of the orchestra is having their appendixes removed, so, without further adieu, I give you the remnants of the Springfield Elementary School Orchestra. On saxophone, Lisa Simpson. On triangle, Martin Prince. And, with a flute up his nose, Ralph Wiggum.” – Principal Skinner “That’s some nice flutin’, boy.” – Chief Wiggum
Month: April 2016
Reading Digest: Link Patrol Blows It
“Food patrol, we’re all starved! Let’s see what you’ve got. That’s it? What happened to all the lobsters, mangoes, and chewy chewy cocoa beans?” – Bart Simpson It’s a seriously short Reading Digest this week, which means either not much is going on or my link finding skills have atrophied. We do have some more of those FXX promo things and a pretty good review of “Raging Abe Simpson”, so it’s not like there’s nothing. Also, Dave yelled at me for not linking more TV stuff here, so if any of you want to see me praise something with the same fervor…
Quote of the Day
“Tonight on Eye on Springfield, the Munchkins from the Wizard of Oz, where are they now?” – Kent Brockman
Quote of the Day
“Now they’ll never save your brain, Hitler.” – Sgt. Abe Simpson Happy 20th Anniversary to “Raging Abe Simpson and His Grumbling Grandson in “The Curse of the Flying Hellfish”! Original airdate 28 April 1996.
Quote of the Day
“I’d like the phone book for Hokkaido Japan, please.” – Homer Simpson “OK, here you go, the phone book for Hokkaido Japan.” – Librarian “Thank you. May I please use your phone?” – Homer Simpson “Is it a local call?” – Librarian “….Yes.” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Hey, Ray, cleaning out the old office, eh?” – Homer Simpson “If I hadn’t already packed my letter opener, I’d give you such a stabbing.” – Ray Patterson
Quote of the Day
“Booo!” – Crowd “But it’s me: Moe! Wearing a sailor suit! Moe, with a lolly! It’s so out of character! Ain’t that worth nothing?” – Moe “Booo! Next!” – Crowd Happy birthday, Hank Azaria!
Sunday Preview: Fland Canyon
Homer recalls a tense family vacation to the Grand Canyon with the Flanders family It appears FOX is now putting as much effort into writing their episode descriptions as I have been at previewing them. There are 14 words in that description. I guess it will be a flashback episode? I equally don’t know or care. I have heard some buzz that there will be a Disney animation styled couch gag, so i guess that’s tonights draw. After tonight there are only 3 more episodes until summertime, so we got that going for us.
Quote of the Day
“Bart, how was your first day of forced volunteerism?” – Marge Simpson “That place sucks. The nurses don’t let Grampa do anything. They practically chew his food for him.” – Bart Simpson “Lucky stiff, I’m working my ass off here.” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Is Milhouse okay?” – Marge Simpson “Uh, I’ll be right back.” – Homer Simpson “Help! Help!” – Milhouse van Houten
Reading Digest: Prince Non-Prince Edition
“And tonight, the following celebrities have been arrested.” – Kent Brockman If you’re binging on Prince-internet right now, there is one link for you below and that’s it. Other than that we’ve got sexy Simpsons quotes, a neat animation that I think was for FXX, and the central hub of Simpsons merchandise in China. Enjoy. Remembering The Prince-Themed ‘Simpsons’ Episode That Never Was ♫ theMusic.com.au – It probably would’ve been hilarious. Then again, the odds against “Stark Raving Dad” actually working once were pretty astronomical, to get that a second time… The Simpsons ‘Stretch’ by Laundry – I don’t get FXX, so…
Quote of the Day
“So long, Lis. I’m gonna stowaway underwater and go where the pool goes. Have a good life.” – Bart Simpson
Quote of the Day
“F . . . L . . . oh, no, I’m sorry, that’s a C, isn’t it?” – Hans Moleman “If that was an oncoming vehicle you’d be dead now! Next!” – Patty Bouvier “But driving is my livelihood.” – Hans Moleman “Oh, take it like a man.” – Patty Bouvier
Quote of the Day
“They’re not going to close the plant, are they?” – Marge Simpson “No, the bank put Lenny in charge.” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Alright, if you’re so smart, tell me who I selected to be lunchroom monitor.” – Principal Skinner “Me?” – Lisa Simpson “Take your sash and go.” – Principal Skinner
Quote of the Day
“Hello, what’s this? Wire hangers? Expired medicine? Old newspapers! Okay, Homer, stay calm. Just quietly get this stuff inside your house. Homer! You’re not listening!” – Homer Simpson Happy birthday Conan O’Brien!
Quote of the Day
“Ooh, trouble in the neighborhood. I’m his neighbor. What’d he do?” – Homer Simpson Happy birthday Bill Kopp!
Quote of the Day
“Five dollars a child? Last year it was free!” – Principal Skinner “Enh. New ownership.” – Fort Springfield Ticket Lady
Reading Digest: French Middle School Kids Edition
“Bonjour, you cheese eating surrender monkeys.” – Groundskeeper Willie I may still try to get these up on Thursdays, but that didn’t even come close to happening yesterday. On the plus side, we’ve got a ton of crappy (and creepy) old merchandise, a look behind the scenes at Universal Studios, French children, and an erudite if weak sauce look at one of the many reasons Zombie Simpsons sucks. Enjoy. Petition · EA Games: Develop a sequel to “The Simpsons Hit & Run” – Got this in an email from reader Hassaan M., who shares a love of Hit & Run with…
Quote of the Day
“Hello, Principal Dondelinger.” – Marge Simpson “Oh, Marge Bouvier, it’s so good to see you. Sorry, sir, we’re not letting vagrants sleep in the gym tonight. But we will be putting some scraps by the back door.” – Principal Dondelinger