“I know you think you’re happy now, but it’s not gonna last forever.” – Lisa Simpson “Everything lasts forever.” – Homer Simpson
Year: 2016
Quote of the Day
“Where’s Homer? And to think I spent all afternoon baking him this cake.” – C.M. Burns “Mmm…I, ughhh…” – Mr. Smithers “I pickled the figs myself.” – C.M. Burns
Quote of the Day
“Mrs. Krabappel, no! That’s Sideshow Bob!” – Bart Simpson “Well, that’s the last time I announce my dinner plans in class.” – Mrs. Krabappel
Quote of the Day
“Please let me stay here. I’ve got nowhere else to go.” – Otto “Forget it. That line didn’t work for my Dad and it’s not gonna work for you.” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“I can’t believe I paid ten thousand dollars for this course! What the heck was that lab fee for?” – Otto
New Simpsons Blog Dedicated to Those Longer Shots
“You will notice, my new best friend, that we are pretty casual around here.” – Scorpio “Yes, sir. I will notice that.” – Homer Simpson A few weeks ago I got an email from a new Simpsons blogger who’s got a novel idea for looking at the show. You know those long shots the show uses to scroll wider or taller than a single scene allows? He stitches them together far better than I’ve ever managed: This is less encouraging. You can see more at By the Big Cooling Tower. (It’s on Tumblr, so if you are too, drop him one…
Quote of the Day
“Moe, I need your advice.” – Homer Simpson “Yeah.” – Moe “See I got this friend named . . . Joey Joe Joe . . . Junior . . . Shabadoo.” – Homer Simpson “That’s the worst name I ever heard.” – Moe “Oh, oh-oh!” – Joey Joe Joe “Hey, Joey Joe Joe!” – Barney Gumble
Quote of the Day
“This Saturday! If you miss this you better be dead or in jail! And if you’re in jail . . . Break out!” – Truckasaurus Commercial Announcers
Quote of the Day
“Please don’t tell anyone how I live.” – Lenny
Quote of the Day
“Liability waiver?” – Homer Simpson “Don’t read it, just sign it.” – Nurse “Yeah, but all these skulls and crossbones on here, I don’t usually sign stuff like that.” – Homer Simpson “It simply says you won’t hold us responsible if you die as a result of gross negligence. It’s a standard form.” – Nurse
Quote of the Day
“Hey, wait’ll you see Lenny. He just got back from the plastic surgeon.” – Charlie “Jeez, Lenny, looks like you got the works.” – Carl “Well, it started out as an eye tuck, but the stock kept going up!” – Lenny
Quote of the Day
“Someday you’ll thank me for all this scary love. But now I’ve got to go somewhere and do some serious thinking.” – Homer Simpson “I’m sure he meant to say ‘serious drinking’.” – Bart Simpson “That’s what I assumed.” – Lisa Simpson
Quote of the Day
“As wacky as those kids were, they were no match for Captain Wacky, later renamed Homer.” – Troy McClure
A Small Example of Typically Astonishing Dialogue from “Rosebud”
“I’m so funny! This is gonna be great!” – Homer Simpson “What are you doing?” – Marge Simpson “I’m writing a delicious send up of Mr. Burns for his birthday party. Is “poo-poo” one word or two?” – Homer Simpson The Simpsons wouldn’t be what it is without the acting, the animation, the music, the sound effects, and everything else, but ultimately it all derives from the writing, and the writing on the show was as finely honed as any artistic masterpiece. Consider this brief stretch of dialog from “Rosebud”: Homer: “Ow. Where did I lose ’em? I’ll never wiggle…
Quote of the Day
“Dad, I have a problem.” – Homer Simpson “Why’d you come to me? I don’t know nothing. I used to get by on my looks. Now they’re gone! Withered away like an old piece of fruit!” – Abe “Grampa” Simpson “Are you done?” – Homer Simpson “No, not yet. I was voted the handsomest boy in Albany, New York!” – Abe “Grampa” Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Hey, Lis, check this out: non-stick coating.” – Bart Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Oh, this is wonderful! You’re alive!” – Homer Simpson “No thanks to you, Homer!” – Bart Simpson “Why you little…!” – Homer Simpson “Now, Homer, please, the boy’s just had a very serious operation.” – Dr. Hibbert “Oh, right.” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Beans, beans, the musical fruit, the more you eat, the more you toot!” – Bart Simpson “Avert your eyes, children! He may take on another form!” -Springfield Christian School Teacher
Quote of the Day
“Let me in! Someone’s trying to kill me! Sweet, merciful McGillicuddy, you gotta open the door!” – Abe “Grampa” Simpson “Who is it?” – Homer Simpson “It’s Grampa, and it sounds like he’s gotten into the horseradish again.” – Marge Simpson
Quote of the Day
“There are only forty-nine stars on that flag.” – Marge Simpson “I’ll be deep in the cold, cold ground before I recognize Missoura!” – Abe “Grampa” Simpson