“I think Lisa needs to feel a little special tonight. How about letting her ride up front too?” – Marge Simpson “Eh, I tried.” – Homer Simpson As was inevitable as soon as FXX decided to run the marathon consecutively, instead of something more humanitarian like banishing Zombie Simpsons to the unemployable alcoholic angry loner hours, there have been some defenses of Zombie Simpsons cropping up in the last few days. To start things off, we’ve got three of those, followed by another overflowing pile of other great stuff. We’ve got several links to fan art, lots of people reminiscing…
Category: Simpsons
Reading Digest: The Hell With It Edition
“There. Finished.” – Homer Simpson “You are?” – Lisa Simpson “Well, it’s a quick job, but it’s shelter.” – Homer Simpson “It is?” – Marge Simpson Just like last week, this is by necessity incomplete. I just can’t keep up, but there is a ton of good stuff below. My inbox is also a mess, and I know I owe like half a dozen people e-mails, so hopefully I get to that and then fill in many of the links I didn’t have time to get to. In the meantime: enjoy. Not Allowed In The Deep End: Ralph Wiggum’s Finest…
Reading Digest: FXX Is *Really* Bad At TV Edition
“But those shows all look so crummy.” – Homer Simpson “We could dress it up a bit. We could bring a fern, and a folding chair from the garage, and the most decorative thing of all: the truth.” – Marge Simpson FXX got a lot of good press out of this Simpsons marathon thing. Then they went and stretched the image in a way so dumb that I initially didn’t even consider it a possibility: Oof. As plenty of people on Twitter have pointed out, that looks atrocious. Maybe you don’t want to just have black bars on either side,…
Reading Digest: FXX Marketing Shifts Into High Gear Edition
“Were you on my roof last night, stealing my weather vane?” – Ned Flanders “This interview is over!” – Homer Simpson The big 12 day marathon on a channel neither I nor millions of other people get will begin next Thursday morning. This week we’ve got several links about it, including the full transcript of a conference call interview Al Jean did earlier this week (there’s actual news for once!) and some very cool posters. In addition to that, we’ve got more of the fan made Lego Springfield, an unveiling date for the building sized mural in Oregon, Harry Shearer…
Reading Digest: Spreading Stupidity Edition
“Now for operation Strike Make Go Longer. . . . You know, I heard Skinner say the teachers will crack any minute.” – Bart Simpson “Skinner said the teachers will crack any minute, purple monkey dishwasher.” – Teacher “Well, we’ll show him! Especially for that purple monkey dishwasher remark.” – Mrs. Krabappel Sorry for the later than usual posting, but that Uproxx/Warming Glow thing was just too damn dumb to be dealt with in a snarky sentence or two. (That it came on a blog named after a Simpsons joke is just aggravazing.) As you’ll see, the stupid has already…
Reading Digest: Crossover Reaction Edition
“Fans reacted to these slapdash episodes with yawns, angry yawns.” – Behind the Laughter Announcer The big news this week was a five minute preview video of the upcoming Family Guy crossover, and it was everywhere. There were so many links from random sites that one was in Cyrillic, but outside of fawning headlines from radio stations and other teevee industry marketing appendages, the reaction was overwhelming negative, and we’ve got several links to prove it. You can see the video at a couple of them, but I wouldn’t recommend it. I made it two minutes in and gave up on about…
Reading Digest: Promising Features, Regrettable Drawbacks Edition
“Congratulations, Mr. Simpson, this invention of yours has made us all rich, especially you! It’s simple yet ingenious, and it fits right in the palm of your hand. Every person in America now owns one of these, and in many cases, three or four.” – Imaginary Executive “Uh, could I just get a look at that?” – Homer Simpson “Now, why would you need to see it? You’re the genius who invented the . . . product in question.” – Imaginary Executive The big news this week was the first look at “Simpsons World”, an app/website-of-some-kind that’ll be debuting in October. I…
The Day the Laughter Died
By Mike Zanna There was a time when The Simpsons was the best show on TV. The show that currently calls itself “The Simpsons” has little resemblance. It’s not nearly as good. It’s not even good compared to the rest of the stuff on television. It’s like The Simpsons, but without everything that made The Simpsons so amazing. The show has become a hollow shell, a shadow of itself, a ghost of its former greatness. I’m sure there’s another supernatural metaphor I could use. So what the hell happened? At some point, The Simpsons went off the air and was…
Reading Digest: Fun for All Ages Edition
“I think it’s nice we’re doing something Maggie will enjoy for once. Besides, I’m sure Storytown Village is also fun for everyone, from eight to . . . God only knows.” – Marge Simpson There are more than a few things that make The Simpsons unique, even when compared to other hit programs. Close to the top of that list, and this is borne out more and more with each passing year, is the damned near agelessness of it. At some point, the world is going to tire of the Simpsons family and it’ll become a part of history, but that…
Reading Digest: Makeup Edition
“This next one’s for the ladies. How many times have you gals been late for a high powered business meeting only to realize you’re not wearing makeup?” – Homer Simpson “That’s every woman’s nightmare.” – Marge Simpson “That’s why I invented this revolutionary makeup gun! It’s for the woman who only has four fifths of a second to get ready. Close your eyes, Marge. . . . And now you’re ready for a night on the town.” – Homer Simpson “Homer, you’ve got it set on whore.” – Marge Simpson That Marge related makeup line they announced a few weeks…
Reading Digest: Harry Shearer Speaks Between the Lines Edition
“What did Simpson do to you?” – Mr. Smithers “Oh, nothing other than drive me to distraction with his incompetent boobery. Terrible at everything! A complete moron . . . but I’m not really free to talk right now.” – C.M. Burns Thanks to Freedom Day tomorrow, it’s a short week and nobody’s spent much of it on the internet, so this is a very short Reading Digest. And since big holidays are always some of our lowest traffic moments of the year, I thought I’d bump it to today. There’s the usual collection of usage, some fan made stuff,…
Reading Digest: Teaser Announcement Edition
“What’s Gabbo?” – Bart Simpson “I figure it’s some guy’s name. Some guy named Gabbo.” – Homer Simpson It’s been relatively quiet around here the last few weeks. I’ve had a Season 16 disc from Netflix sitting next to my computer since the beginning of the month, but haven’t yet gotten around to more Lies Make Baby Jesus Cry or anything else. However, it was all in the service of something equally pointless: another little mini-book. It’s much shorter than “Zombie Simpsons”, so even using the word “book” feels like a stretch, but it does have a cover: Thanks, Cessna!…
Reading Digest: Play Reviews Edition
“I’m dreading the reviews, I can tell you that.” – C.M. Burns Last week I mentioned that the post-apocalypse Mr. Burns play was opening in London. Well, London being something of a theater loving town, we have a deluge of reviews this week. Most are quite positive, some are decidedly not, but I suppose that’s life in showbiz. In addition to that, the merchandising march continues, a couple of Simpsons alums do some charity work, there’s quite a bit of excellent usage, and people keep finding creative ways to use the Lego figures. Enjoy. Family Guy vs. Simpsons – Smooth Charlie’s…
Quote of the Day
“Wow, man, what is this place?” – Bart Simpson “I prefer not to be called ‘man’. My name is Belle, and this is the Maison Derriere. That means the, uh, back house.” – Belle Happy birthday Tress MacNeille!
Reading Digest: It’s Not Supposed to Be Good Beer Edition
“Duff, please.” – Homer Simpson “We don’t sell Duff. We sell Fudd. ” – Beer -N-Brawl Bartender “Okay, Fudd me.” – Homer Simpson This week we’ve got two links to Australian beer aficionados who were less than impressed with the recently released “Duff” beer. Long story short, it’s meh at best and kinda gross at worst. This is unsurprising, as crappy merchandise is crappy merchandise, even when it is infused with sweet, mind numbing alcohol. More amusing, however, is the fact that Duff isn’t supposed to be good. It’s supposed to be the kind of thing German executives consider swill, where…
Reading Digest: No End to Licensed Merchandise Edition
“Oh, Dad, you must’ve bought me every Malibu Stacy accessory there is!” – Lisa Simpson “Not quite. They were out of Malibu Stacy lunar rovers.” – Homer Simpson This week we’ve got links to more designer t-shirts, Lego knockoffs, a crappy alarm clock, a small “collector’s” model of Powell Motors’ last design, and I think I forgot a couple. Also, we’ve got two links from Australians who’ve gotten their first taste of Moe’s and Duff. (If this keeps up all the way through the actual 25th anniversary in December, I may have to re-title these posts “Merchandising Digest”.) Fortunately, that’s…
Reading Digest: Call for Guest Posts Edition
Between the holiday, the end of the television season, and the fact that it’s now basically summertime, the Simpsons had a pretty sparse week on-line. All those things also mean that it’s time for my annual solicitation for guest posts. If you’ve got something you’d like to say about the show, send it in. We accept rants, cranky letters to the editor that end with “I am not a nut”, well thought out analyses, and just about anything else. Pictures and images are welcome, and we’ll be happy to link back to your Twitter account, blog, or what have you.…
Reading Digest: Lots of Clothing Edition
“I need a formal dress for tonight!” – Marge Simpson “You’ve come to the right place.” – Patty Bouvier “We’ve got classy duds up the yinyang. . . . I call this one, ‘Fantasy in Maroon’.” – Selma Bouvier “It’s got some cigarette burns, but we can patch ’em up with new vinyl.” – Patty Bouvier “It’s a bit peppery for me. Why don’t we put this in the maybe pile?” – Marge Simpson Season 25 rolled unmourned into the past this week with hardly a peep from the internet. I was sort of hoping for a few more stories about…
Behind Us Forever: The Yellow Badge of Cowardge
“Gratzi, gratzi, you have brought great joy to this old Italian stereotype.” – Don Vittorio DiMaggio “No, no, Don Vittorio, you’re not-” – Legs “Yes, I am. I know it, I am.” – Don Vittorio DiMaggio If nothing else, “The Yellow Badge of Cowardge” capped off Season 25 with the same brand of forgettable and lackluster nonsense that we’ve come to expect. (Points for consistency, if literally nothing else.) Jokes and childishly simple plot points are explained ad nauseam while the overall story staggers around in a world of dull nonsense. So, for example, near the middle of the episode Homer and…
Reading Digest: No One Cares About the Season Finale Edition
“Aren’t you going to watch the rest of your cute cartoons?” – Marge Simpson “Nah, come on Lis.” – Bart Simpson “Maybe there’s something else to do on this planet.” – Lisa Simpson Thank Jebus, most of the Lego hoopla has fallen down the internet memory hole and we’ve got a full set of great links for what feels like the first time in forever. There’s crazy people driving a Simpsons car across Australia, tons of cool fan made stuff (everything from Homer as a serial killer to a nice Malibu Stacy cross stitch), some fun lists, several people who…