“I was twenty-four years old with a beautiful girlfriend and a job with a future. . . . Hey, you’re… READ MORE
“I am the wondrous wizard of Latin! I am a dervish of declension, and a conjurer of conjugation, with a million hit… READ MORE
“This novelty foam hand is ludicrously oversized. Go swap it for a smaller one.” – C.M. Burns “It is a… READ MORE
♫”Then all the reindeer loved him/ And they shouted out with glee/ Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer/ You’ll go down… READ MORE
“Look at how disciplined they are. They’re just like the terra-cotta warriors of Xi’an.” – Lisa Simpson “They sure are.”… READ MORE
“Dos huevos, por favor. Oh, que lastima.” – Bumblebee Man “I gotta steal that bit.” – Krusty the Klown Late… READ MORE
“Egad, man! How are we supposed to pass the time?” – C.M. Burns “Best bet is to stake yourself out… READ MORE
“Say, let’s bring him back to life by using technology!” – Future Guy “Aye caramba!” – Bart Simpson “Yay!” –… READ MORE
“My only hope is this homemade Prozac . . . Hmm, needs more ice cream.” – Homer Simpson I’ve long… READ MORE
“What kind of show you got for us, Mr. Burns?” – Reporter “Well, the ape’s going to stand around for… READ MORE
“Stupid party, wish we was trick or treatin’.” – Bart Simpson The annual Halloween episode tends to be pretty bland… READ MORE
“The challenger learned how to fight in the notorious projects of Capital City, and honed his skills while serving time… READ MORE
“I want the whole world to hear the story of my harrowing struggle with hypohemia.” – C.M. Burns The post-apocalyptic… READ MORE
“Bart, we can’t let Bob steal the spotlight. We’re gonna have to stoop to the lowest common denominator.” – Lisa… READ MORE
“My first day of college. I wish my father was alive to see this.” – Homer Simpson “Hey!” – Abe… READ MORE
“Is it true you attempted suicide when you heard the news?” – Vulture #1 “Are you and Princess Di just… READ MORE
“How was it?” – Bart Simpson “It wasn’t that great.” – Lisa Simpson “Be honest.” – Bart Simpson “It was… READ MORE
“Devilishiously satirical! I wonder if anyone else got that?” – Dr. Hibbert “We’re out of here!” – Homer Simpson That… READ MORE
A passionate baseball fan blog celebrating America’s favorite pastime.