“Get ready for exciting quarter mile action at the Springfield Dragstrip! It’ll be motorized mayhem, mayhem, mayhem! Do we need all those ‘mayham’s? We do. Alright, fair enough. I suppose you know your business.” – Mr. Smithers Watching football on FOX just now there was a promo for the season premier of Zombie Simpsons. The announcer told me to get ready for “action”, “action” and “action”. He literally said it three times. Remember when the appeal of Simpsons was comedy? FOX doesn’t.
Month: September 2009
Quote of the Day
“Now stay tuned for six hours of exciting football action!” – Brent Gunsilman “Well, bye-bye belt!” – Homer Simpson The first NFL Sunday of the year is like some beautiful dream.
Quote of the Day
“Have you been up all night eating cheese?” – Marge Simpson “I think I’m blind.” – Homer Simpson
Friday Link Dump – ‘Think of the Children!’ Edition
“Think of the children!” – Helen Lovejoy Can The Simpsons be used as a cromulent educational device to teach the childrens how to do good English? Unpossible! We’ve got advertising to children, a shitty example of satire for high school students, and the moral quagmire that is “Lisa the Iconoclast”. Also there’s some excellent usage, an idiot who likes Zombie Simpsons, and the before time, the long long ago, gets described as both the “Golden Era” and the “Golden Years”. Enjoy. Lisa’s Dilemma – Academic discourse about whether or not Lisa and Donald Sutherland did the right thing in not…
Quote of the Day
“Stupid babies need the most attention.” – Officer Goodman, Department of Child Welfare
Quote Of the Day
“Don’t do what Donny Don’t Does… (sigh) They could have made this clearer.” – Bart Simpson
Alliteration and foreshadowing
Another Wednesday, another sight gag. Other evil women with names starting in “J” not mentioned on the sign: Jessica Lovejoy.
Simpsonized Naruto
I’m not a Naruto fan, so I have no idea if the matchings of the Simpsons characters with the Naruto characters are the least be accurate or funny. However, all of the quotes used for voice over are from the before time – no Zombie Simpsons here – and that makes me happy. (Found via See the Simpsons)
Quote of the Day
“I say if it feels good, do it.” – Police Chief Wiggum “All right! (laughs)” – Dr. Hibbert “Don’t snap my undies.” – Police Chief Wiggum
“The Great Money Caper” Makes Baby Jesus Cry
“Do you remember when you lost your passion for this work?” – Lisa Simpson This one continues Season 12’s depressing insistence on nonsense plots and radical twist endings at the expense of, you know, humor or a story. Once again the emphasis is directed more at faithfully reproducing a pop culture concept rather than at satirizing it. In this case they’re trying to send up “con artist” movies like The Sting (which is mentioned in the commentary), but the episode ends up consisting of little more than plot twists followed by explanations and exposition. Now, I don’t recommend anyone watching…
Quote of the Day
“I wish I could retire. Boy, that’d be sweet.” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Don’t worry, this frosting’ll come right off. Beauty, isn’t she?” – Homer Simpson “Well it’s hard for me to judge, since I’ve never bowled in my life!” – Marge Simpson “Well if you don’t want it, I know someone who does.” – Homer Simpson Happy Birthday Julie Kavner!
Quote of the Day
“You know Bart, you don’t have to found a town to be a hero. Sometimes a hero can be a young boy with the courage to stand up and admit he’s made a mistake.” – Jebediah Springfield’s Head “Yeah, well, I’m running a little short on courage right now.” – Bart Simpson
“The Computer Wore Menace Shoes” Makes Baby Jesus Cry
“And did I mention that the monster is a 10-year old boy? Quite a twist, huh? Bet you didn’t see that one coming.” – Narrator The brain searingly awful third act of this monstrosity is based off of a short lived 1960s British television program called The Prisoner. It’s a sort of lamented cult classic for nerds and geeks of an older vintage than me. Had I, or any of my friends or family, heard of The Prisoner when “The Computer Wore Menace Shoes” was first broadcast we might not have been quite so bewildered by the whole island kidnapping…
Quote of the Day
Image used under CreativeCommons license from Flicker user joepyrek. “Before I sing the national anthem, I’d like to say that college football diverts funds badly needed for education and the arts.” – Lisa Simpson The first football Saturday is finally here, praise Jebus!
Justin Fargas, they hardly knew ye
“And now the winner for the most promising new series on cable: Old “Starsky and Hutches”.” – Homer Simpson “Accepting the award is the son of the guy who played Huggy Bear.” – Announcer Our fantasy football league (Yea! football’s back!) just had its draft the other day, and in the late rounds I found myself in a position where Justin Fargas was my best move. I can hear you football fans now, “No! what were you thinking! he’s a Raider! you might as well have drafted a Lion!” But was I worried? No. Because this man is the son…
Friday Link Dump – Not About Season 12 Edition
“Listen, we’ve been meaning to have a talk with you about your reviews. Everything’s a rave! ‘Nine thumbs up’, what the hell is that?” – Garth Tralawney, TV Critic There have been more half assed reviews of Season 12 in the inbox in the last two weeks than I care to think about. Most of them are glowing in a “look at all the features!/this show is a timeless classic” kind of way. Today’s link dump is the stuff that wasn’t those, this includes a neat eBay item, bad web design (as if we should talk), lots of excellent usage…
Quote of the Day
“Troy! Mac Parker. Ever hear of… Planet of the Apes?” – MacArthur Parker “Uh… the movie, or the planet?” – Troy McClure “The brand new, multimillion dollar musical. And you, are starring, as the human.” – MacArthur Parker “It’s the part I was born to play, baby!” – Troy McClure
“Day of the Jackanapes” Makes Baby Jesus Cry
“So what’s your big idea, how do we end this?” – Roger Myers Jr. “Hmmm, let’s see . . . um . . . oh, couldn’t Itchy share his pie with Scratchy? Then they would both have pie.” – Marge Simpson “It’s different, I’ll give you that.” – Roger Myers Jr. This is the Sideshow Bob episode from Season 12 and by the rock bottom standards of Season 12 it’s not 100% terrible, more like 95% terrible. So while it has a couple of good lines (I like Bob asking to live in the storage unit) it’s still got a…
Quote of the Day
“I’ll have four tax burgers, one IRS-wich, withhold the lettuce, three dependent-sized sodas, and a FICA-ccino.” – Homer Simpson “Fill out schedule B. You should receive your burgers in six to eight weeks.” – Squeaky-Voiced Teen