“And that horrible act of child abuse became one of our most beloved running gags.” – Homer Simpson In our ongoing mission to bring you only the shallowest and laziest analysis of Zombie Simpsons, we’re keeping up our Crazy Noises series for Season 22. Since a podcast is so 2004, and video would require a flag, a fern and some folding chairs from the garage, we’ve elected to use the technology that brought the word “emoticon” to the masses: the chatroom. Star Trek image macros are strictly forbidden, unless you have a really good reason why Captain Picard is better…
Month: March 2011
Quote of the Day
“You want to pick on immigrants? Then pick on Willie!” – Groundskeeper Willie “Willie, please, the children want to pick on someone their own size.” – Principal Skinner
Compare & Contrast: Big Screens and Ballgames
“Homer! Homer! X-Y-Z.” – Marge Simpson “Examine my zipper, why? Whoops.” – Homer Simpson Zombie Simpsons is nothing if not a heartless and brainless imitation of The Simpsons. Unfortunately for those charged with doing the imitating, the real thing left very few topics uncovered during its run. Consequently, Zombie Simpsons is forced to dig up old ideas, slap a more modern theme on them, and pretend that they’ve done something new. This happens in ways small and large. For a small one, look at the awkward way “Love Is a Many Strangled Thing” dredged up Bart’s crank calls to Moe. …
Quote of the Day
“If I did agree to help you, you could only earn money by doing good, socially responsible things. Nothing evil.” – Lisa Simpson “Nothing evil. That’s exactly the kind of radical thinking I need.” – C.M. Burns
Quote of the Day
“She must think you’re after her eggs!” – Not Joan Embery “I only ate one!” – Krusty the Klown
Use It or Lose It
“There’s something I used to do in this situation, but . . . can’t . . . remember.” – Bart Simpson “Ha-ho?” – Nelson Muntz Atrophy is a merciless bitch. Similar to entropy, it’s the rule that says every living thing, from people to protists, have to keep doing stuff to avoid becoming dead. If you stop using your legs, because of laziness or injury, pretty soon they’ll wither to nothing. Ask anybody who’s ever had to wear a cast about how quickly debilitation sets in. The same principle applies to creative endeavors like television shows. If you stop doing…
Bonus Quote of the Day
Both images taken from Wikipedia. “If there’s a task that must be done/ Don’t turn your tail and run/ Don’t pout, don’t sob/ Just do a half-assed job!” – Shary Bobbins Happy birthday Alf Clausen!
Quote of the Day
“Here’s the deal, Grampa, a guy I think was an explorer left this in the bar one night. It may be a map to ancient treasure, or directions to some guy’s house, but to find out we’ll need money, we’ll need provisions, and a two man diving bell.” – Moe “It’s pretty stupid, but so far you’re the front runner.” – Abe “Grampa” Simpson Happy 20th Anniversary to “Old Money”! Original airdate 28 March 1991. [Edited to fix incorrect punctuation.]
Sunday Preview: “Love Is A Many Strangled Thing”
Dave’s on the road today, but he took the time to improve the promotional image for tonight’s disgrace. Courtesy of Simpsons Channel, the wretchedly auto-erotic company line: When Homer inadvertently humiliates Bart in front of a stadium crowd, Marge encourages Homer to enroll in a fathering enrichment class taught by therapist Dr. Zander (guest voice Paul Rudd). Shocked to learn that Homer often strangles Bart for mischievous behavior, Dr. Zander conducts a series of treatments with the help of Kareem Abdul-Jabbar (guest-voicing as himself) to teach Homer what it feels like to be young and small. “But when Bart learns…
Quote of the Day
“Thou hast forsaken my church!” – God “Well, kind of, but-” – Homer Simpson “But what?” – God “I’m not a bad guy, I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I’m going to Hell?” – Homer Simpson “Hmm, you’ve got a point there.” – God Happy birthday George Meyer!
Ned Flanders: Party Guy
“That was Edna Krabappel. You only get one chance with Edna Krabappel.” – Sideshow Bob Via HollywoodChicago.com comes an interview with Marcia Wallace. She talks about her career, how she got started and, naturally, Mrs. Krabappel. It’s a neat little read, but there’s also this nauseating bit about an upcoming episode of Zombie Simpsons: Carol had better luck than poor Edna, she is looking for love in all the wrong places. I just did an episode last week where I have a romance with Ned Flanders. And there is going to be an online poll to ask America whether they…
Quote of the Day
“Hello, I’m Leonard Nimoy. The following tale of alien encounters is true, and by true I mean false. It’s all lies, but they’re entertaining lies, and in the end, isn’t that the real truth? The answer is no.” – Leonard Nimoy Happy birthday Leonard Nimoy!
Reading Digest: Coincident Birthdays Edition
“I can’t believe it, I’m being mocked, by my own children, on my birthday.” – Homer Simpson “It’s your birthday?” – Bart Simpson “Yes, remember? It’s the same day as the dog’s.” – Homer Simpson “Santa’s Little Helper, it’s your birthday? We gotta get you a present, yes we do, yes we do.” – Lisa Simpson “We love you, boy.” – Bart Simpson “Good doggie, good doggie.” – Marge Simpson “Lousy loveable dog.” – Homer Simpson Our friend Steve at “In 10 Words” put up a post to celebrate his 24th birthday on Wednesday . . . the same day…
Quote of the Day
Image yoinked from Gothamist. “Well, sir, I won’t bore you with the details of our miraculous escape, but we desperately need a real emergency exit.” – Charlie “Why that’s a fabulous idea. Anything else you’d like, how about real lead in the radiation shields?” – C.M. Burns
Think of the (Future) Children!
“You just demonstrated applied knowledge; and due to the difficulty and relative obscurity of the reference, you deserve an extra point on your exam.” – Mrs. Krabappel A couple of weeks ago, Matt Zoller Seitz wrote an article for Salon about the longevity of pop culture in general and The Simpsons in particular. He was watching “Krusty Gets Kancelled” with his kids (aged 7 and 13), and he was concerned that they weren’t getting all the jokes. They were laughing, but he worried that they weren’t enjoying it on as many levels as he was. Being a well practiced columnist,…
Quote of the Day
“What’s that guy doing here?” – Bart Simpson “Lionel Hutz, court appointed attorney. I’ll be defending you on the charge of, murder one? Wow, even if I lose I’ll be famous!” – Lionel Hutz
Forty Square Feet of Awesome
“Our arts and crafts center is, in actuality, a Dickensian workhouse.” – Lisa Simpson A guy named Kyle McCoy is creating a forty square foot image of Springfield from perler beads, which is a hell of a lot of work since an individual bead is less than a centimeter across. Not only is this a fantastic idea, its author is a wise man when it comes to the topic of Zombie Simpsons: “Now, I’m a big fan of The Simpsons. Not the newer ones, so much (sorry Matt), but for its first eight seasons it was the best thing on…
Quote of the Day
“All this free time, I never thought I’d get sick of ‘Razor Fight II: The Slashening’.” – Dolph “I probably should stop, my doctor says I have the wrists of an eighty year old.” – Kearney
Crazy Noises: A Midsummer’s Nice Dream
“Yeah Dad, it was bad enough when you tried to pass yourself off as Tom Bosley, but Krusty?” – Lisa Simpson “You weren’t complaining when I got you this close to Chachi.” – Homer Simpson “What’s a ‘chachi’?” – Bart Simpson In our ongoing mission to bring you only the shallowest and laziest analysis of Zombie Simpsons, we’re keeping up our Crazy Noises series for Season 22. Since a podcast is so 2004, and video would require a flag, a fern and some folding chairs from the garage, we’ve elected to use the technology that brought the word “emoticon” to…
Quote of the Day
“I make no secret of my past. But isn’t our system of justice based on the idea that a man can change?” – Sideshow Bob “Uh, have the boys check into that.” – Chief Wiggum