“Boy, you don’t have to follow in my footsteps.” – Homer Simpson “Don’t worry, I don’t even like using the bathroom after you.” – Bart Simpson “Why you little!” – Homer Simpson
Month: March 2011
Quote of the Day
“Now, I don’t want you to worry class. These tests will have no effect on your grades. They merely determine your future social status and financial success . . . if any.” – Mrs. Krabappel
Quote of the Day
Image yoinked from Wikipedia. “But what would turn Bart into a man fast? You have to think for me.” – Homer Simpson “Well, let’s see now, time was you send a boy off to war. Shooting a man fix ’em right up. But there’s not even any wars no more, thank you very much Warren Christopher.” – Moe
Reading Digest: Licks Edition
“Oh look, you haven’t touched your salt lick. Num-num, good salt lick.” – Lisa Simpson This week we’ve got lick-able food, and some excellent guitar licks. Sadly no salt licks, but them’s the breaks. In addition to that there’s some television retrospectives, a list of people you don’t want as your boss, an awesome new Tumblr, a couple of fan made links (including one by a wee child), and a very creative use of an animated .gif file. Enjoy. [Programming Note: Crazy Noises for “A Midsummer’s Nice Eve” will be along next week, but there’s no new Zombie Simpsons this…
Quote of the Day
“Drederick, what do you think of Homer Simpson?” – Reporter “I think he’s a good man, I like him, I got nothing against him, but I’m definitely going to make orphans of his children.” – Drederick Tatum “Uh, you know they do have a mother, champ.” – Reporter “Yes, but I would imagine that she would die of grief.” – Drederick Tatum
Quote of the Day
“I got the white stars you wanted, but I couldn’t find any red hearts, yellow moons, or green clovers.” – Betsy Ross “Well, I’ll use it. But I’m not paying for it.” – George Washington
Blockbuster? I Know That Store!
This is a minor point, but it goes to something larger. The above image is from Season 3’s “Saturdays of Thunder”. It’s just a brief establishing shot, but it manages to poke fun at the format wars of the late 1970s and early 1980s. Notably, it needs no dialogue to set it up and it doesn’t take aim at any one institution. It’s a joke at the expense of a general cultural artifact, and that means that all these years later it still works even though the specific conflict it describes is long over. After all, vanquished video formats have…
Quote of the Day
“Gee, your station has a lot of problems.” – Lisa Simpson “Tell me about it, just look at our morning guy.” – KJAZZ Guy “Hello, this is Moleman in the Morning, good Moleman to you. Today, part four of our series of the agonizing pain in which I live every day.” – Hans Moleman
Compare & Contrast: Homer on Tour
“Has anyone mentioned that Homer doesn’t know anything about mountain climbing, and that this is all crazy?” – Marge Simpson “Well yes, a number of people.” – Neil Just a few minutes into “A Midsummer’s Nice Dream”, more than a decade of accumulated bad habits catastrophically cratered the episode: Zombie Marge: Homie, you know all the bits, maybe you could help him. Zombie Homer: I can’t do reefer comedy, I’m drunk, two different animals. Zombie Marge: Homer Simpson, that man’s albums have given you decades of entertainment, and seen you through some very square times. Help him! Zombie Crowd: [Cheers…
Quote of the Day
“When I started this clown thing I thought it would be nothing but glory, you know, the glory of being a clown. I tell you, it’s hard, tiring work. But when I see the smiles on their little faces, I just know they’re getting ready to jab me with something.” – Homer Simpson Happy birthday David Silverman!
Meta and Morbid
“The guy’s so high he doesn’t even know that’s Dave!” – Homer Simpson “Homer? Homer?” – Bobby Mindich “Homer’s not here, man.” – Homer Simpson “Okay, very good.” – Bobby Mindich No sooner do we poke fun at Zombie Simpsons for its complete reliance on jamming the same few characters into any situation than they have Chong audition every third person in Springfield to replace Cheech. There are about five hundred different things they could’ve done there: they could’ve invented new acts, pulled some other old ones out of retirement, created thinly veiled jabs at comedians who’ve long since faded…
Quote of the Day
“She’s locked in the car and refuses to move.” – Eddie “Did you flash your lights?” – Chief Wiggum “Yes.” – Lou “Well, I’m fresh out of ideas.” – Chief Wiggum
Sunday Preview: “A Midsummer’s Nice Dream”
Straight from the unfortunately named FOX publicity machine, FOX FLASH, here’s a preview for tonight’s episode of Zombie Simpsons: The town is abuzz when Cheech and Chong announce a Springfield stop on their much-anticipated reunion tour. But when Cheech and Chong take the stage in front of their loyal fans, the jokes were just not the same for Chong, so Homer steps in and delivers all the punchlines by heart. Impressed, Cheech invites Homer to go on tour with him as new duo “Cheech and Chunk” while Chong forms a more progressive comedic team, “Teach and Chong,” with Principal Skinner.…
Quote of the Day
Image used under Creative Commons license from Flickr user Mark Legault. “Welcome home son, I broke two lamps and lost all your mail.” – Abe “Grampa” Simpson
Quote of the Day
“There’s nary an animal alive that can outrun a greased Scotsman.” – Groundskeeper Willie Happy birthday Frank Welker!
Reading Digest: DDoS Edition
“I’ve got to get out of here . . . calm blue ocean, calm blue ocean, calm blue ocean, calm blue ocean.” – Ms. Hoover WordPress suffered a rather large DDoS attack this week which I hadn’t even noticed until I went through the WordPress tags for “The Simpsons” and “Simpsons” looking for interesting links. The number of posts with those two tags was about a fifth of what it usually is, and there are gaps of whole days, so I’m betting that got screwed up. As a result, there’s a much shorter than usual Reading Digest this week. But…
Quote of the Day
“Homer, I want you to meet my new special lady. Say hello to Starla.” – Kirk van Houten “Can I have the key to the car, lover? I feel like changing wigs.” – Starla
Crazy Noises: The Scorpion’s Tale
In our ongoing mission to bring you only the shallowest and laziest analysis of Zombie Simpsons, we’re keeping up our Crazy Noises series for Season 22. Since a podcast is so 2004, and video would require a flag, a fern and some folding chairs from the garage, we’ve elected to use the technology that brought the word “emoticon” to the masses: the chatroom. Star Trek image macros are strictly forbidden, unless you have a really good reason why Captain Picard is better than Captain Kirk. This text has been edited for clarity and spelling (especially on “bludgeon”). One of the…
Quote of the Day
“I think Smithers picked me because of my motivational skills. Everyone always says they have to work a lot harder when I’m around.” – Homer Simpson
Quote of the Day
“Then I’m sentencing you to one week of the lowest, most degrading work known to man: janitorial work!” – Principal Skinner “Ah, I’m standing right here, sir.” – Groundskeeper Willie