“Lisa, it’s time you learn the truth about men.” – Patty Bouvier “They’re pigs?” – Lisa Simpson “The bitterness is strong in this one.” – Patty Bouvier
Month: May 2015
Please Stop With the $14 Million Number
“If I’d spent my life listening to Dismal Doras like you, I wouldn’t be worth two-hundred-million dollars today.” – C.M. Burns “But according to your most recent biography, you only have one-hundred-million dollars today.” – Lisa Simpson “I’ve ha-, . . . I’ve . . . ” – C.M. Burns “Um, actually, sir, it’s, uh, considerably less than that.” – Mr. Smithers A nice, headline grabbing number, preferably with a dollar sign next to it, is a well known pageview booster. So let this be my usual renewal related reminder that there is no creditable public information on what the current or…
Rumor Control: Harry Shearer (Possibly/Probably) Leaving Zombie Simpsons
“Nobody’s mentioned me, have they?” – Principal Skinner “I thought I heard someone say your name in the cafeteria, but they might have been saying ‘skim milk’.” – Bart Simpson The internet is full of reports that Harry Shearer will not be doing voices for the recently announced two season renewal. This being the internet, the certitude of the headlines ran a bit ahead of the actual information. Here are the facts: 1. Over the last couple of days, TMZ (I know, gross) reported that Shearer was not on board with the most recent renewal. 2. Late last night (though…
Quote of the Day
“That tree’s been in Springfield since the time of our forefathers. Give it back, or we’ll bust in there and take it.” – Homer Simpson “Bust in here and take it? You must be stupider than you look.” – Shelbyville Homer “Stupider like a fox!” – Homer Simpson Happy 20th Anniversary to “Lemon of Troy”! Original airdate 14 May 1995.
Quote of the Day
“Krusty, are you making any money?” – Bart Simpson “Nah. That guy’s giving it away for free.” – Krusty the Klown “Old gray mare she ain’t what she used to be, ain’t what she used to be, ain’t what she used to be!” – Crazy Old Man Singer
Quote of the Day
“That’s not my mother.” – Marge Simpson “I’ll be back in a jiffy!” – Abe “Grampa” Simpson “Can I come too? . . . Oh.” – Old Woman
Behind Us Forever: Bull-E
“I guess I’ve always used violence as a way of getting attention.” – Jimbo Jones “Yes, yes! Me too!” – Nelson Muntz Bart gets bullied, so Marge gets the town council to pass an anti-bullying law, which allows Wiggum to lock up a bunch of random people, which puts Homer into group therapy for bullying Flanders, which causes Homer to become a hero, which causes Flanders to resent him and make him beg for forgiveness. That terrible sentence took you much less time to read than this episode would to watch. – Weird couch gag with all the soccer balls,…
Quote of the Day
“Hi, I’m Troy McClure. You may remember me form such TV-spin-offs as ‘Son of Sanford and Son’, and ‘After Mannix’.” – Troy McClure
Sunday Preview: Bull-E
After Bart gets bullied at the school dance, Marge convinces the town to pass anti-bullying legislation. Homer then gets arrested and sent to rehab for bullying Ned Flanders, only to subsequently leave rehab as a hero. Albert Brooks is guest voicing tonight, so those of you who choose to watch have that going for you. I especialy won’t be watching now, as I feel whenever he voices a character anymore it just makes the episode even worse by comparison. It’s like using Godiva chocolate syrup on a dog shit sundae. Rest assured, I believe there is only one more episode before…
Quote of the Day
“And the Lord said, ‘Whack ye all the serpents which crawl on their bellies and thy town shall be a beacon unto others’. So, you see, Lisa, even God himself endorses Whacking Day.” – Reverend Lovejoy “Let me see that.” – Lisa Simpson “No.” – Reverend Lovejoy
Quote of the Day
“Wait a minute! Martin, if you, Milhouse and I went in together, we could buy a copy of Radioactive Man #1 right now!” – Bart Simpson “Wow!” – Martin Prince & Milhouse van Houten Happy birthday James L. Brooks!
Reading Digest: The Show Will Go On, The DVDs Will Not Edition
“Come on, who wants to complain with me?” – Lisa Simpson The obvious big news this week was the renewal. For those of us who were paying attention, it wasn’t the least bit surprising. For the overwhelming majority of people who have the good sense not to be paying attention, it was big news. So the Simpsons signal-to-noise ratio went bonkers and, as is always the case when that happens, this is a pretty short Reading Digest. We’ve only got one renewal link, and that was just because it has a marvelous headline. In other not-news news, there will be…
Quote of the Day
“You are now carrying my child.” – Eduardo “But how?” – Lisa Bella “It is the mystery of the dance.” – Eduardo
Quote of the Day
“Whatever you do, Mom, we’ll be proud of you.” – Lisa Simpson “Well, thank you, honey.” – Marge Simpson “As long as it’s Constitutional.” – Lisa Simpson Happy 20th Anniversary to “The Springfield Connection”! Original airdate: 7 May 1995.
Quote of the Day
“And so, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I rest my case.” – Lionel Hutz “Mr. Hutz, do you know you’re not wearing any pants?” – Judge Snyder “What? Ahh!” – Lionel Hutz
Zombie Simpsons Renewed For Forty-Four More Episodes
♫”If this old clown was found dead in his bed tomorrow/ I’d be in heaven, still doing this show!”♫ – Krusty the Klown This here blog has been live on the internet for six years and change. In that time we’ve seen four renewal announcements, including last night’s. Here are the details: – two more full production runs of 22 episodes each – will take the show through Season 28 and give it the first seven episodes of a Season 29(!) – new guaranteed episode total of 625(!!) – the next time to look for a renewal announcement will be…
Quote of the Day
“Good evening, young man, my name is Charles Norwood. Furthermore to this beer, I would also like three of your finest, cheapest cigars. Here’s my ID, which confirms my adultivity.” – Kearney Happy birthday Josh Weinstein!
Behind Us Forever: Let’s Go Fly a Coot
“Hey, look, someone’s attractive cousin!” – Bart Simpson This week on Zombie Simpsons, a bunch of old Air Force pilots show up to threaten Homer into spending time with his dad, or something. Meanwhile, Milhouse’s hot cousin (voiced by Carice van Houten, a/k/a She Who Queefs Shadows on Game of Thrones) likes to use e-cigarettes. Nothing much happens in either. – Short couch gag and shortened opening, don’t see that too often. – We open at Milhouse’s super elaborate birthday party. Homer picks up the take home bag and helpfully tells us what each of the contents are as he picks…
Quote of the Day
“And now, to present the trophy, three time soap box derby champion, Ronny Beck!” – MC “Congratulations, Bart, seeing you out there brought back a lot of memories.” – Ronnie Beck Happy birthday Russi Taylor!
Sunday Preview: Let’s Go Fly A Coot
Grampa’s days in the Air Force are rehashed, while Bart picks up the smoking habit in an effort to impress Milhouse’s Dutch cousin, Annika. Do you think airing what will probably be an anti-smoking PSA counts as community service for Murdoch? Carice van Houten (The Red Woman for all you Game of Thrones fans) is voicing the role of Annika tonight, so I guess that is about as convenient as it gets. Well I guess I don’t know how convenient it is for anyone, but it’s definitely the reason the episode was written. I can see it now…. “Hey an…